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Funny stories.

Summary:
Well, in this selection of stories, you'll find stuff to make EVERYONE LAUGH. Enjoy! GYS THE PURPLE FLAMINGO IS GETTING IT;S OWN SOTRY....,BUT THATS A PREVEIW OF CHAP.1


Notes:
Let them laugh!


3. Prankcall

Rating 0/5   Word Count 1901   Review this Chapter

Prank Call

Bella and Emmett were bored.

The rest of the Cullen’s were hunting.

Suddenly, Bella and Emmett had ideas.

“OMIGOSH EMMETT I GOTS THE BESTEST IDEA” She screamed.

“ME TOO, YOU TELL ME YOURS FIRST MAYBE THEY’RE THE SAME!” He screamed back.

“WELL, MY IDEA IS THAT WE PHONE MIKE AND GET HIM TO ADMIT HE’S GAY, THEN I PHONE HIM TO TELL HIM THAT I’M COMING OVER TO HIS HOUSE, THEN YOU PHONE EDWARD AND SAY I’M GOING OVER TO MIKE’S AND I’LL NEED PICKING UP AT 5:30, THEN I’LL CONVIENTLY SAY THAT I’LL MAKE DINNER FOR ME AND MIKE, THEN WHEN I ‘NEED’ AN INGREDIANT, I’LL GO TO THE ‘SHOP’, EDWARD WILL COME, THEN MIKE WILL HAVE A CRAZY GAY ATTACK AND RAPE HIM MWHAHAHAHAHA” Bella screamed all in one breath, and Emmett stared at her in disbelief.

“Nah, My idea was we slap Eddie with fish, but yours is better” Emmett said, mwhahahaing.

Emmett picked up the phone.

He dialled Mike’s number.

Mike answered.

Mike Emmett and Bella

Hello?

Oh, hi Mike, I was wondering if you would mind if I came round later?

Oh, no Bella, not at all, when will you come and when will you leave?

Umm, 6-8? Edward can pick me up.

Ok, I’ll see you in an hour.

Bye Mike

Bye Bella

Ok, now to call him again.

Ring ring.

He answered.

Mike B+E

Hello?

Hello sir, we have been informed by an anonymous source that you are a young gay who is afraid?

Ummm, yes?

Ok, I would to set you up on a date.

We have your file, you have blue eyes, blond hair, and your name is Mike Newton, yes?

Yessir.

And you are looking for a person with reddish hair or brown hair, with any colour eyes, preferably a boy.

Yessir.

We have file number 667382, Edward Cullen, he will come to your house at 5:30pm, ok? Don’t dress up. You may have sex with him. Use a condom. Don’t come crying to us. Bye.

*hang up*

Emmett called Edward.

Edward Emmett and Bella.

Hello?

Hey, Eddie, Bella is going round Newton’s house from 4-5:30pm, can you pick her up?

Yes, is she going of her own free will? Let me talk to her.

*phone to Bella*

Hey Edward, yeah, I’m going over Mike’s, super secret spy mission, I will be safe, and yes, I will kill him if he tries to shag me k?

Ok, Bella, sounds like you know what you’re doing, I’ll see you at 5:30. Byeeee

Buh-bye. Love you.

*Hang up*

“Mwhahaha, now we have that part sorted out, Bella, go pick something to wear, so you don’t look suspicious, mwhahahahaha.” Emmett said, looking at the wall.

Bella returned in a slutty outfit.

Emmett threw a brick at her.

Luckily he missed.

She went back, and changed into dark jeans, green t-shirt, and a hoodie saying Unique.

It was 6pm, Bella got in her truck, winked at Emmett, waved and vroom vroomed off.

Bella happily sat in her truck as she drove to Newton’s.

Meanwhile at Newton’s house.....

Mike was looking for his phone.

He found it and dialled a number.

Mike His Mom

Hello?

Hey, Mommy, can you get me some condoms, I gots a date? I gots 2 actually.

Awwww, my lickle fwuffy bunny is growing up .

Mooommmm, just get me the condoms, you’ll embarrass me.

Okay, lickle fwuffy bunny, they’re behind the microwave.

Okay Mommy, I gots to go now, byebye. I wuv you.

Byebye Mikey-Poo.

*hang up*

Mike rushed to the kitchen, looked behind the microwave and got the condoms.

He put them in his pocket and hid the box.

*Ding-Dong*

The doorbell rang!

I opened it, and Bella was standing there.

I nearly died.

“Hey Mike.” She said in an angel’s voice.

So, it went on from there.

Then she suggested she make dinner.

I agreed.

Then she said she needed an ingredient from the store.

Off she went.

I waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Then the doorbell rang.

OMC, IT WAS EDWARD.

I had a mad fit then.

Everything went black.

Eddie’s pov.

I rang the doorbell and waited for my angel.

Mike opened to door.

He went crazy.

He jumped on me and started kissing me.

He ripped his and mine clothes off, and produced a condom.

He put it on, and proceeded to rape me, while making out with me.

I screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed.

Then he started giving me....

A blowjob.

NOOOO ME DOES NOT WANT PEANUT BUTTER WITH THAT” Me screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed.

My screamings was interrupted by Mikey Pikey putting peanut butter on his HIV infested dick.

And

He

Shoved

It

In

My

Mouth

And

My

Screams

Were

Muffled

By

That

He then proceeded to shove it back up my arse, and started up his rhythm again.

Then the door opened.

Bella was standing there.

“Errr....what did I miss?” my angel said.

The End!