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Belonging

Summary:
banner Heaven just moved to Eatonville Washington. Another move due to her "problems". She is dying inside as her parents distance themselves from there "freak" daughter. She doesn't know why she is freak, or how she ended up the way she is. Edward is bruised and broken after Bella chose a life with Jacob over him. Can Heaven let the Cullen's know her secret? Will Edward drop his walls and let this sweet stranger into his life? Will she ever find somewhere that she truly belongs?


Notes:


8. Chapter 8

Rating 0/5   Word Count 3367   Review this Chapter


His hands were roaming over my body, making me tingle all over. His skin was smooth, hard and cold. Beautiful. He pressed his lips against mine, and I accepted the kiss hungrily pulling his face to mine. The kiss turned rougher and harder, and I could feel the moisture building between my legs.

I wanted him, now. I wanted all of him. He began to kiss down my neck, gently biting my skin as he went. His cold hand found its way up my shirt and began to tease my nipples. I let out a low moan, “Oh Edward.”.


Suddenly I heard a laugh, and my eyes shot open. I could feel the sweat that had perspired on my brow and the moisture between my legs. I sat up quickly and looked around trying to figure out where I was.

I realized I was on Alice’s couch in the living room, and there sitting at the other end of the couch near my feet, was Edward. I rubbed my eyes and looked at the clock, 3:15 in the morning. I turned to him,

“What’s with you waking me up in the middle of the night?” I asked, running my hand through my tangled hair.

“Did you enjoy your dream?” He smiled cockily, and then it dawned on me why I was awoken by a laugh. I could feel the heat rising up into my face at the memory of the dream. He laughed again.

“Get away from me.” I was near tears of embarrassment now. I felt the warmth rising from my feet, over my head, and I knew he was no longer able to hear what I was thinking.

“Bella used to dream about me,” His tone was sad, depressing, “Though I’m sure they were never dreams like that.” He looked at me and gave me a faint smile.
“They were nightmares.” He continued, “About what I’m not sure. She would wake up screaming, crying. I would feel so helpless because I didn’t know what to do. So I would just hold her, comfort her. She never wanted to tell me about them.”

I listened, letting him pour out everything that he needed to be freed from.

“She would just want me to hold her, and she said the dreams would go away. I doubt she has any of those dreams anymore, since she is no longer with me.” He became quiet for a few moments then continued,

“She had nightmares because I’m a monster, I thirsted for her blood. It sung to me. I nearly killed her the first time I’d saw her. I have never smelled a human that I wanted as badly as her. I mapped it out too, how I would kill everyone in the classroom, and then finish off with her. I thought about Carlisle though, what it would do to my family, to him. So I ran; I got as far away from her as I could until I felt I was capable of dealing with it again.”

He took a deep breath and leaned back and put his arms behind his head,

“I would have never been able to do to her, what you just dreamed about. I couldn’t ever risk losing control with her. I nearly killed her again after the first time I saw her. A vampire was tracking her, he bit her, and I had to suck the venom out of her. I almost didn’t stop, she tasted better than I could have imagined.”

He was looking at the ceiling, almost as if he was reliving every moment he was telling me about. “When I thought she had died, I was ready. I went to the Volturi and pleaded with them to kill me. I didn’t want an existence without her. They declined of course. So I was going to step out into the sun, in front of humans, to get them to fulfill my request. Bella stopped me though. I thought I had died at first, and met her again in heaven.”

He turned his head to look at me; I had my legs curled against my chest, my chin resting on my knees listening intently to his story, wondering why he would choose me to tell it to.

“Did Alice tell you that she left me for a werewolf? Well a shape shifter, whatever you chose to call it. I prefer Dog.” I raised my eyebrows and shook my head.

“Yes, his name is Jacob. I left Bella, after my brother Jasper tried to attack her. She was with him day in and day out, until she came to save me in Volterra. He made a much larger impact on her than I imagined. She fell in love with him; she left one monster for another.”

We sat in silence for awhile, then I chose to break it,

“Edward, I’m hear to listen, whenever you need me. I hope you know that. But, I’m curious, as to why you chose me to tell this to? When you hated me with such passion only a day ago.” He looked at me and gave me a half smile,

“Heaven, you feel much about yourself the way I feel about myself. You’ve lost the two most important people in your life, because they cannot handle you with the person you are. I’ve lost the most important person in mine because I am what I am. I feel that you, of anyone, could maybe understand in the least the way I feel.

“I’ve also never hated you, I hated what you reminded me of. I never knew what you were dealing with inside.” It felt like a hive full of bees inside my stomach, he said his words with such passion. It was hard for me to believe the way he hated me only a day ago had blossomed into the start of a friendship.

I forced my guard down around me, and began to sing a Britney Spears song in my head. I crawled to the end of the couch where he was sitting and wrapped my arms around his neck with my legs off to his left. I felt his body stiffen, and after a second relax. He wrapped his hard cold arms around my back and gave me a hug. It was a friendly hug, nothing more.

I felt his body quiver as he hugged me. I knew inside he was crying. Crying for his lost love. I pulled away from him and spoke to him,

“I’m here whenever you need me. I do understand you Edward, better than you could imagine.”

He surprised me this time by pulling me back to him, rather forcefully, into another hug. I inhaled his scent, and he smelled absolutely wonderful. He tightened his arms around me,

“Bella loved how I smelled. She told me once.”

“Well you do smell magnificent Edward.”

He chuckled, “What’s odd Heaven, is I smell you, and it’s wonderful, but you don’t smell like a human.”

I smiled and pulled back to look at him,
“Well thank God you don’t want to eat me!” He laughed again. His hold on me didn’t lessen and I laid my head on his shoulder.

We clung to each other like two damage souls, begging for something else. For some kind of companionship, friendship. His body was cold, but not unbearably. It was comfortable. Inhaling and exhaling his scent, I began to drift off. With his cold arms wrapped around me, I fell asleep.

I was awoken in the morning by Alice humming a song. I opened my eyes, and looked around. I was back on the couch as I had been before Edward had woken me up.

I began to wonder if it was all just a dream when Alice walked over and said, “So, Edwards acting happier this morning. What did you do to him?” I laughed and threw the blanket off and stretched.

“Your couch sucks, you know that Alice. My back is killing me.” She smiled.

“Well if your going to make a habit of this, I’ll consider getting a bed for the spare room.” I pretended to be hurt and she laughed, “Or we could just go pick one up today?” she said, I smiled, “Well I went to your house last night and got what you needed, you can use the bathroom across from my room.” She said and pranced away, still humming a tune I didn’t recognize.

“Thanks!” I called to her.

Soon after she left the room I began to think about why I would be staying here, because I didn’t have a home where anyone cares. Mere seconds after the thought crossed my mind, I heard the front door open and Edward stepped in, he smiled at me widely, “We care.” he said, and handed me a bag of what appeared to be McDonalds.

I felt the warmth spread over my feet and up to my head, and I knew he could no longer hear what I was thinking. I looked up from the bag, and smiled at him.

“Thank you Edward.” I said. He hopped over the back of the couch and sat next to me, “No problem, I’m getting better at hearing you now. Before I could only hear you from a short distance, I’m tuning into you farther away now.”

I was already eating the breakfast he had given me, Great!” I replied sarcastically with a mouthful of food. He laughed and stood up from the couch.

“Want me to take this upstairs for you?” He asked, already reaching for my bag.

I shrugged, “Sure.”

I doubted he had waited for my answer, because he was up the stairs and out of my view before I had it halfway out.

When I was finishing up with the food he had brought me, a handsome man walked down the stairs, with Edward close behind.

“Hello Heaven, I’m Carlisle.” He stuck his hand out to mine; I took it and studied him a little more closely. He appeared to be in his early twenties, but could pass for early thirties. His eyes were the same shade as the rest of his family, and his skin just as pale. All of this adding up to make a very alluding and handsome appearance.

“Nice to meet you,” I shook his hand firmly.

“Edward and Alice have told me a lot about you. We don’t have much time to talk now, but after the school day I would like to come to your home and see this painting they are talking about, and talk with you a bit more. If that is alright with you of course.” He said.

I smiled, “Of course, your family has so graciously welcomed me into your home, you are all welcome to mine.” He flashed me a brilliant smile of straight white teeth.

“Well then I will be seeing you a bit later then. It was a pleasure to meet you.” He gave Edward a short subtle nod, and went out the front door.

Getting into the shower, I inhaled a deep breath of the humid warm air. I was overwhelmed; so much had changed in my life in such a short period of time. I began to reflect on the events of the past few days. Of Edwards new found hatred to happiness, of my good friendship with Alice, of not being as different as I thought once was. I was glad I had found someone like Edward, someone who felt a little of the way I felt. Someone who could relate.

I got out of the shower and began drying off, when I felt the warmth spread up my legs and to my head. I knew Edward was close to me, and instead of dread in my stomach, I felt an odd sense of comfort. I heard classical music playing through the wall. I smiled, knowing he was in his room. Close enough for him to get in my head if I’d let him.

I resumed getting ready for school, throwing on the new white skinny jeans I had bought the day before, and a red strapless top I had gotten from Gap. I threw some curlers in my hair and began to blow dry it. After I removed the curlers and looked in the mirror, I was pleased with what I saw. I put on a small amount of eyeliner and mascara.

When I walked out of the bathroom I could hear the music louder. I walked across the hall to Alice’s door and gave a light knock. Before my hand connected the second time, Jasper opened the door.

“Hey Jasper,” I said, “Is Alice ready?” He gave me a kind smile,

“She’s already downstairs waiting for you and Edward.”

“Thanks,” He nodded his head and shut the door. I turned around quickly and instantly hit what felt like a brick wall. I looked up and Edward was looking down at me smiling,

“Good thing we didn’t connect, that would be a nasty bruise.” I laughed

“Ready to go?” He asked his eyebrows up in question.

“Yep,” I bounced past him, and I could feel his eyes on my back.

When we arrived to school, I immediately dropped my guard. I had no intention of getting discovered, and losing the only place where I belonged. I glanced sideways at Edward,

Stay out of my head, or I will torture you with Britney all day long.

He smirked and gave me a slight nod.

Sitting in Art, and working on my horrible self portrait, an announcement came on over the loud speaker,

“Hello Students, This is a reminder of the King of Heart’s dance this Friday. Tickets sales are starting today, you can get yours at lunch or for an hour after school in the office. I hope to see you all there.”

After the speaker turned off, I noticed a handsome boy with dark hair looking my way. I could feel his eyes on me through the rest of class. When the bell rang and I was walking to put my folder away, he approached me.

He was short for a boy, only around an inch taller than my 5’1” frame. He had light sea green eyes, and square jaw. His lips were full, and his nose had a slight hook at the end. I had to admit he was very handsome.

“Hey, Heaven right?” He asked.

I smiled and gave him a small nod.

“I’m Chris,” He stuck his hand out, I extended mine, and to my surprise instead of shaking it, he brought it up to his lips and kissed the back of my hand. He dropped it gently, and gave me a large smile.

“How would you like to have lunch with me today?” He asked.

I could feel the heat rising into my cheeks, “Umm... Sure.”

He smiled again, “Well, I’ll meet you outside of the cafeteria if that’s alright?”

I nodded in response.

Science went by quickly, and as I was on my way to English, Chris ran up beside me.

“Still on for lunch right? No change of mind?” I gave him a friendly smile and nodded again.

“Okay see you.” He smiled and ran up ahead of me to a large group of boys. I saw them glance my way over their shoulders.

When I got into English, Edward was already seated in his seat staring ahead. I felt the warmth building up my feet, and tried hard to push it away. When I was seated, he turned his head too look at me, his eyes were blank, and unemotional. My mind began to wonder to the dream I had the previous night, and I felt my face get hot.

Immediately I started singing a song in my head. Edward’s face had no change in expression. After the first glance, he didn’t acknowledge me at all through class. Mr. Cox told us we would soon be reading Romeo and Juliet. I saw Edward wince, and pain replace the blank look in his eyes.

I didn’t have to hear his thoughts to know what was going through his head. I reached my hand over to touch his arm, and he pulled away as if he had been burned. It hurt me when he did that. So I let my guard flush over me, and focused my attention on Mr. Cox.

Lunch came quickly, and as promised, Chris was waiting outside the cafeteria doors for me.

“Hey,” He said, when I approached, I smiled back politely.

When we got inside and seated, Chris went to get me a soda, and I began to look for Alice. When my eyes reached the cafeteria door, I saw her walking in and hopping over to me.

“Hey,” she said “He’s cute, and he’s going to ask you to the dance.” She glanced toward Chris in line.

I laughed, “What am I going to say?” She smiled and then shrugged, “Can’t tell you that.” I laughed again,

“Are you going to sit with us?” I asked her.

“Sure because I don’t think Edward will be joining us for lunch.”

Chris walked over to us and handed me my soda and sat down. I quickly introduced Alice, “Chris this is my best friend Alice, Alice this is Chris.”

She smiled at him and complimented him on his designer jeans. They continued on with there conversation about designers and shopping. I felt my feet getting warm and looked up towards the cafeteria door; Edward walked in and looked right at me. He scanned the table, and his eyes laid on Chris for a few moments. He then turned and stormed out. I felt my shield dissipate, and turned back to Alice and Chris’ mindless conversation.

After school, Chris walked me to the Volvo where Edward and Alice were waiting.

“So I’ll see you tomorrow?” he asked, I smiled and nodded. He surprised me by pulling me into a tight hug. It was a forced awkward hug, and I glanced over his shoulder to see Edward staring straight ahead. I could tell from the way his lips were pursed that he was angry.

I pulled away from him and said goodbye and got into the car. Edward pealed out of the parking lot, spitting the wet oil from the concrete towards Chris.

“Edward that was rude!” I complained, he didn’t respond and continued to drive faster. I let the warmth cover me and huddled into the corner of the backseat like I had when I first rode home with him. Alice was silent during the drive.

When we reached there house, Alice hopped out. Before I had a chance to move, she popped her head back in,

“Carlisle is going to meet you and Edward over at your house. I am going to spend some time with Jasper. I’ll see you in a little bit.”

I was going to ask why she wasn’t coming with us, but she had already shut the door and we were backing out of the drive.

I stayed in the back seat, keeping my distance from him. Once on the road he was driving much slower than usual, almost as if he wanted to keep torturing me with the silent hell we were riding in. He spoke slowly muttering something I couldn’t understand,

“What?” I demanded.

“That guy want only one thing you know?” I was appalled, “Yeah and what’s that?”

“He once to be the first guy in school to, well you know.” My eyes widened,

“Oh please Edward, who are you trying to kid. Why would you care if that’s all he wanted anyways. You gave me the cold shoulder all day today at school. One second you’re pouring out your feelings to me, the next you act like I’m not even there? I can only be your friend if you let me in!” He exhaled loudly.

“It’s hard to let someone in!” He shouted, “I’m only trying to look out for you, you’ve lost enough already, you don’t need your heart broken too.” His tone was calmer now.

“I’m capable of make my own decisions, thank you.” I knew I was being difficult, but he wasn’t going to get away that easily with how he treated me at school.

He was silent until we pulled up to my house, and there was a black Mercedes sitting in the driveway. I saw Carlisle in the driver’s seat. We pulled along the curb, and Edward got out. Before I had a chance open my door, he was already on my side opening it for me. His eyes still looked angry when he looked down at me. We said our hellos to Carlisle and headed inside.