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Light in my Life

Summary:
Bella is heartbroken, hurt, and tired of living her life. But change comes when she creates a bond with a stranger in the strange family that took her in. (Set in the time frame as Twilight, but in a complete alternate universe.) Create your own banner at mybannermaker.com!


Notes:
Thanks for giving my story a chance! I appreciate it more than you know! I own a New Moon ring. I do not own Twilight. *sighs* Stephenie Meyer owns it. *sobs*


6. Turning My World Around

Rating 5/5   Word Count 2558   Review this Chapter

She slept through the night and most of the morning. It was 11:48 when her eyes began to flutter. She had tossed a bit throughout the night. She had unconsciously rolled a bit away from me, but only enough to where my cold skin would not affect her so much.

I found out that she talked in her sleep.

She would say the name Renee a lot. She would sometimes say something about Forks. That it was too green, too cold. I couldn’t help but smile at that. She misses the sun. The rain makes her anxious. It was amazing how much her sleep-talking fascinated me. Her unconscious thoughts were a pathway into her mind. The only mind I did not know.

Alice had brought her a change of clothes, a bathrobe, and a towel last night. We were to get her to take a shower today.

Correction: I was to get her to take a shower today. Sigh. How in the world was I to do that?! It was quite obvious that she was most comfortable around me. But this was something a woman should help her with. I considered calling Alice to help her.

Oh no you don’t, Edward Cullen! My sister’s thoughts shot at me. You know it will be easier if you do it!!! Of course she didn’t know this for sure. She couldn’t get a clear vision on it, because I had no idea how I was to approach the subject. Without my decision, her vision was imperfect.

Oh for the love of all things good and holy! Of everyone in this house, they had to pick me, a man, to help her with this.

Not that I didn’t want to help her. In fact, I knew that I was the best person to do so. But the fact was irrelevant. It was a moot point. I didn’t want her uncomfortable! And I’m sure that my being the one to bring the topic up wasn’t the most comfortable thing for her. But I had no choice. I knew Alice’s decision was made. I knew better than to try to convince her otherwise.

“Mmmmmm . . . “ A murmur came from the girl beside me. Bella rolled over to face me, barely opening her eyes. That changed when she saw me. She seemed surprised that I was there. I quickly hopped off of the bed.

“Sorry,” I mumbled.

“’S okay.” She was close to incoherent. She was obviously still tired, but she sat up and shook her head, clearing it again. She stretched her arms above her head and looked around the room. She met my eyes when she was done.

“Yeah,” I began. “I’m guessing you need to take a shower?” She blushed deeply and wrapped her arms around her torso.

“I . . . guess?” She framed it like a question. Like I was the one who was supposed to tell her yes or no. I had to get something perfectly clear to her. I sat back on the bed and wrapped my arm around her shoulders. I had no idea where this surge of confidence came from. But in that moment, I knew my goal was to help her. And I was going to.

“Bella?”

“Yes?”

“You know you’re welcome here, right?” She looked down. “Well, you are. We all want what’s best for you.” She wrapped her arms around my torso now. “And I’m not going anywhere,” I whispered.

“You promise?” She asked.

“I promise.” I began to rock her again.

“Ummm . . . Edward?” She looked at me as if for confirmation.

“Yes, Bella?”

“What was it you were humming yesterday?” Oh. Well, then . . . .

“I compose. I play the piano. The tune came to mind.” I smiled at her, and she hesitantly returned it. “Would you like me to hum it again?”

She turned bright red. “Uhhhh, no, thank you.” Well, that was confusing. “I’d actually like to take you up on your earlier offer.” She turned her head to where I couldn’t see her face. I wasn’t having that. I turned her head back in my direction.

“You would like to take a shower, now?” I believed that was what she was saying. But she was a confusing girl. And I would be lying if I said I wasn’t intrigued by it.

“Yes, please.” She whispered. I stood up again and offered her my hand. She placed hers in mine and I helped her up off of the bed. This particular room had a bathroom attached to it. I was glad she wouldn’t have to leave the room.

I checked to make sure there was soap and shampoo for her – not needed, really, we didn’t have many guests, but we kept them in here, just the same. – and handed her what Alice had brought. She blushed as she took them, but thanked me before I shut the door.

I sat down beside the door, leaning against the wall. I listened to the sound of the shower running as I hummed some more of the song that was in my head. I had finally finished it. The last piece of the puzzle had been missing until I watched her as she slept.

I was usually able to finish compositions in one sitting, but this time it had taken me longer. It wasn’t truly complicated, but it had a meaning behind it. It reminded me of the one I wrote for Esme and Carlisle. That, too, had a meaning behind it. But I was able to finish that in one sitting. I sighed.

After 15 minutes had past, Alice walked in the door humming the same thing I was humming a minute ago in her head.

What? It’s catchy! She thought before continuing. She shot me a meaningful look before heading into the bathroom. I knew that look. It meant I was to stay out of her head.

When Bella heard the door close she gasped. I think I heard her fall but I couldn’t be sure. I jumped up and stood right in front of the door.

“Hey, Bella, it’s just me! Try to keep you’re footing next time!” She teased. I didn’t see anything funny about it.

“Calm down, Edward, she’s fine.” She told me. “You worry too much.”

Then I realized that I needed to hunt. Badly. If I was to still be around her, and to be so close to her, I shouldn’t be thirsty at all.

“Alice I have to go. I’ll be back soon.” I didn’t think Bella could hear that.

“Alright, Edward,” she said back. “I suggest you hurry.” I couldn’t see why she said that. She was still humming in her head.

I quickly ran downstairs, out the back door, and into the woods. I was going for the first things I would smell. I didn’t like the idea of being away from her. At all.

And that scared me.

*******************************

I returned to the house around three hours later. In my haste I hadn’t paid much attention to the moves of my animal opponents. This gave them the chance to ruin my shirt. It was ripped badly. Not to mention that I had let my frustration out on them. Battling with a bear had left me bloody as well. That didn’t happen often.

I thought back to the happenings of earlier today. I had obviously overreacted. Asking her if she needed a shower wasn’t so bad. I shook my head at myself. I couldn’t believe I had worried so much over it.

I knew why I had, though. I was never a person who was very social. I was always fine being by myself. I loved the company of others, but I always needed time to myself, without others around. When I was human, though these memories were faded, I remembered that my family was within the social circle. News about my family was always floating around the town if it was something worth mentioning. I hadn’t minded, for I had grown up that way, but when I was changed from mortal to immortal I realized that I needed to be secluded. Immediately I didn’t mind. The change had altered me completely.

Also, I was always protective of my family. The Cullens were more than a coven, and if one of us were threatened it included the whole family. I would help with the newborn members, Esme, Rosalie, and then Emmett. It was true that I loved them all, and if someone dared threaten the ones I love then they would deal with me.

I have heard in the minds of everyone in the house how much more protective they are of their mates. Being the odd man out I had no one to protect in such a manner. I had opportunities, but never did they seem real. There never seemed an opening for someone such as me. I felt complete in myself most of the time. But I will admit I sometimes wished there was someone I could love my brothers and father loved their wives. Someone I could confide in. Someone who wouldn’t care what I did, nor what I said. Someone I could treat the same way back.

But never before had I felt something close to that. Never before.

When this Bella walked into my life I felt different than I usually did. My troubles disappeared when I heard her cry; my sole purpose was to make her happy again. But I also wanted to tell her every problem. When she was threatened I cared about nothing else but to make her safe. Yet I also wanted to protect myself so I could stay by her side. It was as if I had gained what my brothers and father had.

But, no. It was impossible.

She was human, and I was a monster. I couldn’t love, it was impossible. There were good people in my family, but did I even deserve to feel love?

“Edward Anthony Masen Cullen!” I had just stepped in the door to see a fuming Alice. I swear, if it was possible, her face would be red. I could almost picture smoke coming out of her ears! It was hard to keep from laughing, so I just smiled a tight smile.

“Yes, Alice?” You could hear a hint of humor in my voice, and, of course, she caught it.

“Don’t you laugh at me, brother. Look at what you did!” She waved her hand up and down the length of me. She looked disgusted.

“Alice, I believe, I did just go hunting,” I reminded her.

“But Edward, you never do this,” she said in the same tone, mocking me.

“Ah, Alice, you of all people should know that you shouldn’t ever say ‘never’.” I was calm, more humored than frustrated. I heard snickering come from various places in the house. I smiled, flashing my teeth.

“Haha, yes you’re hilarious, but can you please explain to me why this was necessary?” My almost-stifled laugh came out in a snort. I side-stepped to the right, but she blocked me. My brow furrowed. I wasn’t going to tell her a thing. And I needed to get to Bella.

“Blame the bear,” I murmured, and side-stepped again. But, of course, she could see what I was going to do, and successfully blocked me again.

“Nuh-uh-uh,” she sang, wagging her finger at me.

“Would you please let me through?!” I bellowed. This wasn’t funny anymore.

“Fine, but take that off!” She crossed her arms. I rolled my eyes and took of what was left of my button-down shirt. “Much better” I sighed and walked into the living room to get to the stairs. But there was no need.

There sitting on the couch was Bella, wrapped up in my blanket. I froze several feet from where she sat. She looked over at me and her eyes widened. I looked down at myself. Huh. No wonder Alice made me take my shirt off. The condition it was in was in no way comforting. It would have scared her. But there was blood on my jeans.

“Bella-“ Then I realized she was blushing.

I don’t even think she’s noticed the blood on his jeans! Alice laughed.

Ah. Well. If I was capable of blushing, I would have been.

“Hi,” I said. Yes, great. That was just the perfect thing to say in this situation. ‘Hi’.

She looked up and met my eyes. “Hello, Edward.” She sounded far away. Tears filled her eyes. She turned back to the television. Steel Magnolias was on, and apparently she and Alice were watching it together.

“I’ll be right back,” I quickly said before running human-paced to the top of the stairs. Once I was out of her sight, I flitted to my doorway. I entered it slowly. I looked around my room, looking for anything different from the last time I saw it. The only thing missing was the blanket that was usually draped across the back of my couch, and I knew exactly where that was.

Opening my closet, I found some of my clothes missing. Alice. I knew it was her doing. She usually picked at our clothes, looking to see if there was anything to be replaced. I didn’t truly mind, but I usually never wore anything more than twice.

I grabbed a darker blue button-down shirt and replaced my jeans quickly. I ran back downstairs in a half human, half inhuman pace. I made my approach more noisy than usual, so as not to scare Bella. She turned to look at me again.

“Wow,” she whispered. “That was fast.” I smiled.

“Was it?”

She nodded. “I don’t think you were up there for even a minute.” Perhaps I had done this faster than I thought. I walked over to her.

“May I?” I asked, motioning towards the seat the spot beside her.

“Of course.” She smiled. The world lit up when she smiled. I sat next to her, content on spending the few hours or so on the couch with her. But her breath still seemed shaky.

I smiled when she leaned into me.

By the time the movie ended and the next began, she had my arm around her, her head on my shoulder, and me wrapped around her little finger.