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Random Subjects (#1)

Alice kicks off Random Subjects with Carlisle. If we know her, she's gonna be outrageous. Yikes! Banner by the fabulous, Kit_Kat_Cullen_XOXO !!!!!!!! alice, carlisle, countdown

Okay, after every Cullen gets a chance to be a guest, Alice is gonna take the Cullens for a special show. (FLORENCE, ITALY)

1. Chapter 1

Rating 3.4/5   Word Count 293   Review this Chapter

(Alice Cullen is on top of a desk on a platform in a multi-colored room with signatures on the walls and a giant sign that says RANDOM SUBJECTS!)

Alice: Hey, there peoples! I'm A.C. Not Air Conditioner, Alice Cullen! I'm welcoming you all to RANDOM SUBJECTS. Today I've got Carlisle as my guest! Go Carly! Send him out, Frank! (Carlisle Cullen stubles from the edge of the set with a very confused expression)

Carlisle: Alice, why is that guys name Frank Comercial?

Alice: What's it supposed to be, Frank Show?

Carlisle: Well, I, uh-

Alice: No, no, no! My show! Now, today's quote is . . . . . .


Carlisle: They most certainly are not!

Alice: Lets test that theory! ( Alice snaps her finger and several men come out. They move the coffee table and replace it with a desk. One man sets a pencil and paper on the desk. They leave.)

Carlisle: What!? That had better not be a timed test you crazy little girl!

Alice: I prefer the term insane. Okay, folks! Carlisle is gonna take a timed test! ( Alice pushes Carlisle into the desk and smiles.)

Carlisle: This is madness! Wait till Esme finds out! How much money did you spend on this insanity?!

Alice: Begin! (Alice clicks a stop watch.)

Carlisle: 600 QUESTIONS IN ONLY 30 SECONDS!?!?

Alice: Oh, too bad! Time's up. FAIL!!! Next test!

Carlisle: 9,000 QUESTIONS IN ONLY TEN SECONDS!?!? Where did we go wrong!?

Alice: DANCE PAR-TAY! (Alice begins dancing to a retarded, wordless, dance song and Carlisle rips out a handful of his own hair. Frank comes out and drags Carlisle and the desk off set as music blares louder.)

Alice: Now get away from your t.vs people. Go get a life. Seriously.

GET YOUR BUTTS AWAY FROM THE FREAKING TV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!