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Tracking down Happiness

Edward met Bella, a typical love story as it may seem. So he came through the window and she fell into his arms... they fell in love blah, blah, blah. The abuse both mentally and physically has taken its toll on Bella and Edwards life isn't exactly perfect, what with his haunted past and all. So is it possible for these tortured souls to find comfort in each other and throw away the key of their past, well the obvious answer would be yes, like any other another story. However there is an unusual twist, I'm sorry for my warped mind.


2. Chapter 2

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Disclaimer - I don't own anything.

Here you go, sorry it took such a long time to update

Err, yeah... enjoy.


Happiness... it's such a magical thing. Like drugs, it makes you feel so lovely; so very, very lovely. It wraps around you like a lover on a warm summers day. It sends tingling sensations through your body. Everything feels just right, it's perfect. It is surprising what some will do for five minutes of it. Just so they can escape their tortured memories. You can't blame them; we can't stop things from happening, after all, we are just insignificant specks of dust. You're like an ant in a colony of millions of ants. If you die, then you die. No one will grieve, no one will even care. It's like you aren't even there.

So back to the happiness, what would you do for it?

Me, I would do absolutely anything for it.

It was that time of day again.


Not only was it the start of yet another new day. I had to spend the best part of this new day in fucking classrooms. In those classrooms, I have to act like a normal civilised teenage delinquent of society. So here I go, again, like every other day I spend on this godforsaken piece of shit. It was eight o'clock exactly when I dragged my scrawny ass out of my bed, I have to be at school by nine so that gives me about half an hour before I get verbally attacked by Alice.

I grabbed some boxers and walked down stairs. Alice was sitting at the kitchen table reading some sort of fashion magazine as I proceeded to get myself some breakfast.

I sat down opposite Alice. Something is quiet right, I normally get bombarded by questions.

"Alice?" I asked she usually isn't so quiet.

She lifted her head from the magazine. "Yes, Edward?"

"What is going on?"

He eyes danced around the room avoiding everything but me there was a little spark to them and her lips grew into a huge grin, "Nothing. Why do you ask?" her voice was ever so dainty.

"Alice. Tell me. You are never this quiet and you usually ambush me in the morning. Is it Jasper?"

Her eyes went wide as she spoke "Jasper and I are fine. Look I have to go and pick up Bella, are you coming?"I rolled my eyes and nodded before heading upstairs to grab some clothes.

I passed Rosalie on the way and laughed at her comment "Ew Edward, get some fucking clothes on and stop scratching your balls. It's disgusting."

"It's nothing you haven't seen before." I winked and ran up the stairs. I pulled on a simple grey button down and a pair of jeans.


I woke to the sound of the birds; they were singing their hearts out. As I rolled out of bed I could hear Charlie snoring in his room through the wall. My entire body hurt and all I wanted to do was fall back to sleep.

I always upset him. If it wasn't my cooking then it was the cleaning. If it wasn't the cleaning then it was the washing. If it wasn't the washing then it was my bad grades. If it wasn't my bad grades then it was my lack of social life. If it's not the lack of social life it was that I go out to much. If it's not that I go out to much then it was my mother's death. Somehow it always came down to that.

The day my mother died.

It was like someone took my world, twisted and dragged it through a blazing fire. My father blames me, and he has every right. About a month after she died, Charlie started drinking more and became angrier. He would wake me up in the middle of the night and send me out looking for her. I was only fifteen at the time and I, too, longed for my mother. I tried reasoning, telling him that she was dead but this only made him become violent.


It was still dark when I woke up. I could see a figure crouched over something.

"Charlie?" I whispered

He stood up and walked closer. "Renee? Oh, where have you been?"

"No dad. She is... dead." The words stabbed my very existence like a constant flow of electricity as they came through my mouth.

He stood still at the end of my bed with a wooden plank in his hands. The moonlight reflected some of features and I could see that his eyes twitched and the left side of his nose wrinkled up. "You are not my Renee, Go and get my Renee!" The wood came straight towards me; I was too late to dodge it as it knocked my head into the wall.

End flash back

Alice was outside in her yellow Porsche, like she said. We were already halfway down the road before I could get in.

"Alice!" I screamed for my dear life.

Suddenly the car stopped violently and if it wasn't for the seat belt then I would be flying through the atmosphere. I looked at Alice who was laughing her little pixie head off.

"What?" she asked her voice as dainty as a flower, like she was innocent.

"You-your driving is, just slow d-down." I stammered and she rolled her eyes muttering that she wasn't going that fast.

I nodded my head and listened half-heartedly while she babbled on about a pair of high heels. It wasn't until Jasper spoke to me that I noticed that he and Edward were in the back seats.

"Hey Bella, guess what you name means in Italian." He asked way too enthusiastically.

I blushed "I don't know, enlighten me."

"Beautiful." he winked.

"Shut up Jasper, leave her alone." Alice scolded him. I was face was going a deeper shade of red by the second. We finally reached school and I walked into homeroom.

The morning passed into a blaze of nothingness after that. I felt numb both due to the rain and the events last night. Jessica completely ignored me in Trig, our friendship had evaporated years ago she had gone onto popularity, hence, leaving me at the bottom of the social hierarchy.

"Isabella, what formula would you use?" Mr Paolini woke me out of my daydream, and I glanced up at the board.

"Erm... Pythagoras?" I hazarded a guess it just looked like a triangle with random symbols next it.

"Wrong, pay attention, it's the Sine rule." I blushed slightly I didn't like to be wrong, I used to be getting straight A's, now I was lucky to get a C. Jessica opened up the textbook and completely ignored me, the triangles all blurred into one. I didn't see the point in this lesson, when would it ever be useful in real life.

Morning break was just a noise, and half organised chaos, the only high-light was when I tripped over my own feet; damn I nearly beat my record. Almost a whole morning without falling, as I fell I saw Edward across the canteen, he headed towards me. He was probably going to make fun of me, I almost ran into the girl's bathroom.

"God the new boy is so cute." I heard some girl say in the bathroom.

"Which one?" said another.

"All three of them." The girls giggled away in awe whilst reapplying there make-up on the dirty mirror.

I collapsed into my seat in biology, revelling in solitude; I don't have to put on a fake face or try to communicate with the rest of my species

I felt a figure sit in the desk next to me. it was Edward, great he sits next to me. His hair was an impossible shade of bronze in the sunlight. Trust the sun to come out just for him.

"Hello, Bella" he said in his velvety voice, I didn't look at his face. A few minutes passed and he was just sitting there, looking at me waiting for some kind of answer. Say something Bella, nod, move, anything!!! Honestly, someone could put a boot in my mouth right now and I'd chew it.

"Bella?" He clicked his fingers in front of my face. There weren't just butterflies in my stomach at the moment, they were full on birds.

"Um..wha-what?" You really have to catch up on those speaking skills Bella, my face went crimson; I could feel the blood rushing to my checks, he is probably wondering if I am mentally contempt. Edward let out a small laugh, his face lighting up in a smile. He had a faint blush as well, but it was nowhere near as pronounced as mine. Luckily the teacher saved me from further social embarrassment by beginning the lesson. I only prayed it wasn't group work.

That didn't happen of course, things never happen the way I hope.

"I have done this lab before, I will do it." Edward said smugly as he organised the equipment.

"Um, yeah ok fine." Is all I could come up with, I looked up and met Edwards emerald eyes quickly then he turned away. My face started to flush again. I watched his muscles on him arm flex as he moved around the slides, he was adorable. The birds were back again, flying around like crazy.

Why am I feeling like this, I hardly know the guy?

"Do you have a pencil?" He asked, as his lips formed into this breathtaking crooked smile. I was frozen, our eyes locked together. And again I couldn't move, the birds were spinning and my heart started trying to kung-fu its way up into my throat. His head cocked to the side, I just looked at him and passed my pencil. I turned my head away quickly; my face was a dark shade of crimson. Yet again...

"So where have you moved from?" I asked praising myself that I didn't sound like I was mentally deranged

"Florida, I miss it sometimes. But Forks has its good points." He joked and I nodded and continued with my doodles.

I hadn't realised that the lesson was finished. "See you soon Bella" Edward said softly with a hint of disappointment in his eyes as he got up from the seat.

"Bye, Edward." His name sent chills down my spine. I left the class room with a huge goofy grin on my face.

Finally it was the end of the day; I walked through the buzz of the students rushing to get home excitedly. I walked up to my locker and saw Alice standing there looking at me with a pleasant smile on her small frame. I opened my locker and took out some books that I will need for homework.

"Edward told me to give you this" Alice said and I shut my locker. "He also said to offer you a lift home."

"Thanks for the pencil" I said turning around, if he really wanted to give me a lift home he would have asked me to my face. Stupid Bella, men are idiots you know that more than most.

"So Bella right, we're new to town. We used to live down in sunny Florida" Why is she talking to me? Everyone knows I'm the freak.

"Are you enjoying the rain?" I asked humouring her. Why am I talking back?

"Not much. Hey, do you want to go shopping on Saturday with me. It'll be fun and I'd rather go with someone who knows their way around to all the best shops" I hadn't been shopping in ages, I mainly wore the Salvation Army left behinds.

"Okay." What?! Why did I say okay, that means I have to interact with actual real people. Without realizing it Alice had walked with me all the way over to Edwards little silver Volvo. It seemed I didn't have a choice now to get in with them.

"You're the police chiefs daughter right?"Edward asked as soon as I sat in the front seat.

"Yup." I didn't know what to say, I should stick to one word answers. "Not bad for an Ovlov." I said as he started the car. What happened to one word answers?


"You know Volvo backwards, O-V-L-O-V, Ovlov." I said blushing again.

Edward laughed proper deep throated laughter. I didn't think it was that funny but I found myself smiling slightly along with him. The journey continued in much the same fashion, with me and Edward laughing together about random things. It has been a long time since I actually felt comfortable laughing with someone.

My house loomed up in front of us in no time, and I jumped out the front seat into the thankfully empty house, Waving goodbye to the Cullen's as I walked.

I cooked Charlie lasagne. He ate in silence, as usual, ignoring me. There was something about his shotgun on the table between us that made the whole ordeal very intimidating. After dinner I tidied away and went to my room, I preferred absent Charlie to the alternative, but sometimes this house could get so quiet. I got my battered old Sony walkman and found a Metallica tape, a bit of guitar smashing was perfect, and you could get completely lost in it. It was with this music thundering through my ears I first dreamt of Edward.

I was in a forest, I was running, with a faceless man was chasing me, but he wore a Police uniform. I ran into a meadow and there stood Edward in the sunlight, I ran into his arms and the woods faded away and we were surrounded by green fields and a blue sky.


Maths has always been a monotonous subject for me. So instead of listening to Mr Maz, I started thinking about Bella.

Did I love her? Not yet. But I could see how easy it would be to fall in love with her, literally it would be like falling: effortless. However to not love her would be the opposite, pulling myself up; fighting against gravity. I am drawn to her, by something that I cannot control.

I hang on to her every breath, it was driving me insane.

What was she thinking about? When I heard her quietly sigh? When she twisted a lock of hair absently around her finger? When she threw her books down with more force than usual? When she rushed into class late? When she would tap her pen against the table?

Then it suddenly dawned on me, I pay far too much attention to this girl.

I was late for biology. She was sitting at the desk hidden behind her hair, as I sat down I could see through the tresses and she was blushing a beautifully deep crimson colour. She didn't meet my gaze. She twisted a lose strand of her dark hair, nervously, between her fingers, her delicate fingers, her small wrist. She looked so fragile, almost breakable.

"Bella?" I asked.

"Hey, Edward." The sound of my name on her lips did strange things to my body, my heartbeat quickened.

Here goes nothing "Would you like a lift home again, maybe we could go get something to eat..." I trailed off, I'm sure I was blushing. She looked at me; the colour on her cheeks was deepening now. She looked worried almost scared.

"I...um, I have to be home by 7." She replied, looking at me. Does that mean yes?

"Great. I will meet you by my car after school." I said through my huge smile, she was staring at me again, full of question in her eyes. She was absolutely stunning. Right now - with her dark hair falling delicately around her pale face, her full lips slightly parted; she took my breath away.

The lesson continued. We didn't talk much, she seemed upset about something. Like the weirdo I was I watched her every move, the slight tapping on the desk, the little crease in between her eye brows as she bit her lip slightly. It was all extremely attractive and my hormones were going wild.

As the lesson ended she stood up, looked at me and walked out of the classroom. Somehow she managed to trip over. Her books went flying and people were laughing. I even cracked a smile as I walked over to her.

"Bella, are you ok." The words were full of concern. Did she notice how my voice wrapped around her name like a caress? I held out my hand. She turned to look at me, her beautiful blush was back. Oh the things she does to me, without even trying.

"I'm fine." She said coldly and scrambled up, holding her arm. I picked up her books and we just stood there, again her eyes were questioning me.

"Here you go" - I passed her a book- "are you sure you're ok?" my smile was gone.

"Thanks. I think I will walk home." She snapped, grabbing the books out of my hands. I just stood there. What did I do?

I caught up with her, the halls were empty. I grabbed her arm gently, she was so breakable.

"What do you want, can't you just leave me alone?" she snapped,

I wanted to say: no I can't, it's not my fault that I am wretchedly in love with you.

Keep it light Edward.

"I'm sorry." She said. "But if you are just talking to me for a joke, then I am not interested." Her eyes were big and brown. It was like she could see straight through me. I stared at her dubiously

"You're all the same." She whispered. What? "Look it was nice of you to give me a lift home, but I'm sorry, I can't do this." She took off running down the corridor.

I watched Bella run away from me down the corridor, her hair reflecting in the luminous lights/ the effect was ruined as she tripped over her own two feet, and spiralled on to the floor. I sprinted towards her but the throng of students slowed me down. As I caught up with her she had picked herself up and was already taking off again.

"Bella!" I shouted her name yet she doesn't turn around. The other students started to bump into me as I stood still in the middle of the corridor completely oblivious to the world around me.

I turned and headed to my last lesson of the day, English. Oh what a joy.

"Wuthering Heights is an epic tale of love that transcends death and survives through class differences and wrong marriages." I stared at the teacher noticing everything about her from the mole on her nose to a chicken pox scar on her forehead, trying desperately not to think of Bella. "What do you think of Heathclift and Catherine's relationship Edward?"

I looked up to see that the whole class was now staring at me, waiting for me to answer. "I think they are selfish and only looking out for their own means, if they'd only talked properly about how they felt nothing bad would have happened, but they had to hide it by deceit and lying. They only admitted their feelings when Catherine was dying and even then they couldn't let go."

"But do you not think that it's true love"

"True love can't be built on lies and childish fantasies" Mrs Burgess looked a little surprised at this and continued droning on about her own opinions of the book. I on the other hand had decided that I had to tell Bella.

I thought of her hair and her smile and realised that I didn't just like her, even though I'd only known her a few days I thought I loved her. I didn't just think I loved her, I knew it. I had fallen, effortlessly. If I were to climb up, it would be impossible.

The bell went for home time and I practically ran out of the classroom determined to catch Bella before she left, had it really only been a week? It felt more like years. Every time I saw her it was as thrilling as injecting morphine into my veins, if not more so.


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