What if Alice never saw Bella jump? Will Bella ever be able to let go of Edward?
Bella continues life in Forks with out Edward. Jacob has picked up the pieces, will she finally realize he is there for her? Will she ever be able to let go of Edward?
6. Chapter 6
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“Bella…” His marble hand was on my cheek, his thumb brushing my nose with every pass. Sparks swam through the air, shooting up from the crackling logs toward the black sky above. The night was dark, stars glimmered in the sky. His arms were around me, his cool hands pressed to my back. We just stood there, embracing each other, and I prayed that the moment would never end. Our eyes were locked together as if searching for solutions to questions that couldn’t be answered. He leaned down, his sweet breath flooding my senses, and gently kissed the tip of my nose. “Bella…” He mumbled; my hands combed through his tousled bronze hair.
“Edward…” He pressed his lips lightly to mine. They molded to mine and his scent filled my head, making it swim; my knees buckled but he held me fast. He pulled me closer, his scent washing over me more powerfully than before. I could feel something cool brush my forehead.
I slowly became aware that I was dreaming, and I squeezed my eyes shut as tight as I could, trying to hold on to my perfect dream. As the last of my minds glorious simulation slipped back into my subconscious, I slowly opened my eyes. There was no way I was going to be able to sleep now, might as well get up and do something productive. Something caught the corner of my eye and I snapped my head around to see the curtain move; must have been the wind. It was drizzling outside with no promise of letting up soon, crushing all my excuses to put the house work off one more day. The bathroom had been seriously neglected and the laundry had been piling up for weeks now. Charlie had left early for work so I was alone. My radio sat on the corner of my desk; it looked awful lonely. I pulled on an old t-shirt and pilled my hair on top of my head in a messy bun and headed over to my desk. The radio was preset on some classical station, probably back when Edward used to listen to it while he waited for me to finish my homework every day after school. I quickly spun the dial to switch the station; I finally decided on pop/ R&B.
My laundry hamper was full, so I went downstairs to grab an extra basket from the laundry room. Charlie had left a note on the kitchen table.
Went to work early.
I’ll be home around 6.
If you want to make plans with
Jake that’s fine, I’ll order a Pizza
Jacob. I almost forgot! Last night had been amazing. Kissing him was easy, like being his friend. I never thought things could be like that for us, but I’m so glad they were. I smiled just thinking about him. The note fluttered to the table as I dropped it and went back up stairs to gather the laundry. My radio was blasting some popular new rock song from an artist I’d never heard of as I tore the sheets off my bed. Surprisingly enough, I was able to finish the laundry in just two loads so I moved on to cleaning the small bathroom Charlie and I shared.
I turned the radio up before I left my room so I could hear it in the bathroom as I cleaned. Man, I really had put this off too long, this place was disgusting. I pulled the Comet and 409 from the small cupboard and began attacking the bathroom staring with the sink. Once the sink was sparkling and all traces of dried of toothpaste had been removed I headed to the tub. I started singing along with the radio as I scrubbed the small yellow tiles on the wall. My head bobbed up and down to the beat and when the chorus began I found myself screaming along with the female artist about ‘belonging together’ and how much her life would suck without ‘you’. I held the soapy sponge up to my mouth and pretended it was a microphone, suddenly I was jumping around and shaking my head in time to the music, my eyes scrunched shut. “Gah!” I dropped the sponge and clutched at my chest; I was pretty sure my heart had stopped beating all together.
Jacob was standing in the doorway to the small bathroom, arms folded across his chest. “Wow, Bella, I had no idea you could sing…or dance.” He laughed out loud and looked me up and down once. “You look great Bells.” I rolled my eyes. Sure if you could call sweatpants, a holey t-shirt, rubber gloves complete with a pink sponge and a rat’s nest of a hair-do ‘great’, then yeah, I’m sure I looked just ravishing. I pulled the rubber gloves off, tossed them in the sink and crossed the room to pull my arms up around his neck. He kissed me softly, then slipped his arms around my waist and stepped back. “So, what are we gonna do today?” He smiled down at me. I stepped forward and wound my arms through his and around his waist, resting my chin on his chest.
“I don’t know. What would you like to do?” I had my most innocent face on.
“How about we watch a movie or something?” His hand slid up my back slowly, making me shudder.
“Uh…sure. That sounds good. Mind if I finish up and take a quick shower?”
“Nope, not at all. I’ll be down stairs if you need me.” His lips found mine and his hand locked into the hair at the base of my neck, his free hand moved to the small of my back and pushed me closer to him. I eagerly returned his enthusiasm, parting his lips with my tongue. His lips became rough on mine, his breath filling my mouth. I broke free and sucked in a lungful of air; his lips moved to my neck, gently kissing from my collarbone up to the hollow behind my ear and back again. My heart was racing and my breathing turned ragged. His hand slowly inched along my waist until he was touching my stomach; his warm fingers curled under the edge of my thin shirt. I gasped; he laughed at my reaction and kissed me lightly before untangling himself and heading downstairs. I gripped the doorframe for support, my head was spinning and little black dots flew around in front of my eyes. I shut the door and quickly, anxious to get back to Jacob.
With my hair still dripping wet from the shower, I bounced down the stairs to meet him. Jacob was watching some sports show; how typical. He smiled as I brushed my fingers across the back of his neck before sitting down next to him. “Hey.” I said, elbowing him in the ribs.
“Hey yourself, pretty lady.” He leaned down and kissed my cheek, and of course my heart fluttered. “What do you want to watch? Please not a chick flick….”He rolled his eyes.
“Ha ha, Jacob. No, I don’t care what we watch. Why don’t you pick something out?” I pushed his shoulder and he dramatically fell off the couch.
“That was not nice.” He looked at me and pulled back into a light crouch. By the time I understood what he was going to do I was already on top of him, the both of us sprawled out on the living room floor. He laughed into my ear, his chest jarring up and down against my body. I just rolled my eyes and kissed him once. His hands locked around my face, keeping me from pulling back. I looked into his deep eyes and he stared back at me; passion filling in for laughter. He moved one hand and propped himself up on his elbow as he kissed me. It was slow and romantic, his lips breaking mine to gently kiss my eyelids and forehead. His free hand sweetly brushed my cheek as he swiftly placed me back on the couch. My face was still hot and red when he finally put the movie in.
Jake sat down next to me, throwing his arm around my shoulders and pulling me close. I curled up into his side and placed my arm over his stomach. I settled in knowing my interest in Jake would soon win out over my interest in the action film playing a few feet away. My head seemed to fit perfectly between his shoulder and head; I nuzzled close until my nose was nearly touching his neck. This was comfortable; this was home. It’s funny how quickly things changed between us when just a few days ago he was just Jacob, just my best friend. Thinking back on it now our relationship hadn’t changed a lot besides the kissing. I was used to Jake holding me close, and he was content with just holding me. I think he knew I was never going to be the same, but I think he always held out the hope that I would be able to give him a little part of my heart anyway. I touched his neck with my fingers and he shuddered a little; I smiled. But there was something nagging, festering in the back of my mind. That dream. It had seemed so real, like Edward had really been there. What was wrong with me? Why had my subconscious betrayed me like that? After weeks of silence and one not so innocent kiss between Jake and me, it finally decided to drag Edward out of the shadows.
I must have been frowning because Jacob’s fingers were smoothing the crease between my eyebrows. “Bella, what’s wrong?”
“Oh, nothing really. Just thinking.” And I was just thinking. Just thinking about Edward.
“Oh. Can I ask you something?” He frowned a little.
“Ok, this is probably going to freak you out but try not to get mad. Ok?” He didn’t wait for my reply. “Last night when I was on patrol around your house I heard you talking in your sleep…Saying something about that bloodsucker. Were you dreaming about him?” He looked me in the eyes and I felt like the air had been knocked out of me. I had been talking about Edward in my sleep and Jake had heard.
“I…um…well, yeah.” I whispered, still looking into his eyes.
“Oh, ok. Thanks for telling me.” He settled back in as if nothing had happened. I sat there looking at him, my mouth hanging open. I had a dream, and a not so innocent dream at that, about someone I had once been willing to give up everything I knew and loved just for the chance to stay with him forever. Someone who had changed me; someone who I still loved and always would, no matter if he loved me or not.
“Why aren’t you screaming at me right now? Why aren’t you shaking?” I hadn’t realized my voice was becoming louder. I was starting to stand up now, my hands shaking at my sides. “Aren’t you mad at me?!”
“Whoa, Bella. No, I’m not mad. Why would I be? It was just a stupid dream. Sheesh. And I thought I had anger problems.” He looked alarmed, but as my hands stopped shaking and the worry lines disappeared from my face he relaxed and pulled me back to his side. That’s right, just a stupid dream. If only he knew what that stupid dream was about, then maybe he would want to rip apart a phone book or something. I shook my head, well if he didn’t care neither should I. I settled back into his side just thinking about that dream. Edwards touch had been so real; so cold. I could swear I actually felt that last one.
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