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Nowhere

Summary:
This is the sequel to my story "Somewhere." you have to read that first to understand the plot because this goes off of that one's epilogue. Somewhere's epilogue can be read seperately from the rest of the story, but there still are minor references in Nowhere to it's predecessor. Edward and Bella are finally together again and getting ready for their wedding. all is well until they go to tell Charlie. Charlie has fallen asleep on the couch and on the news is something that will change their lives forever. now they must run. this time not to find each other, but to escape the danger ahead for them. Places to hide are scarce, even in such a large world, especially with a tracker. Meanwhile, the city of Forks is just finding out about the mysterious news...


Notes:
in this story, Bella and Edward will once again start running around the world, but with more events and to farther places. but this time, they will have somebody else with them. this story might not go the way you think. =] Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Twilight.


15. Haunted

Rating 5/5   Word Count 3235   Review this Chapter

Chapter 15: Haunted

Bella’s POV

I stood there in shock. We were alone, in this tiny old house. One with a rather uncomfortable stench as well. Edward was gone. One minute he was off smelling something with a wide grin on his face, the next he’s disappeared into thin air. And I’m turned around for no apparent reason. Maybe my body is trying to tell me something; that he’s out there, in the big wide open countryside, right through that door.

The only possible conclusion I could come up with is that he left with the woman. The one the rest of us had seen from across the street, but Edward had been too blinded to notice. Or maybe he did. He could have run off with her. She could be his real true love; while I could just be his cast off that he thought he loved. He had always talked about leaving before, how did I know he wasn’t just making up all that stuff about loving me for his own entertainment? Even the proposal could be just that.

He probably wouldn’t have stayed long in that marriage anyway. A year or two at the most. I knew what he said his reasoning was for leaving me, but he never really told the whole truth. Ever. All the time, I seemed to be figuring out things he had hidden from me, or just outright lied about. How could I ever know when he was telling the truth, or when he was just appearing to be doing so?

All vampires seemed to be good liars. Who was Edward not to fit the normal persona? Then again, why would he put so much effort into something he didn’t care about? Not even the most kind-hearted person I know would do such a thing. There just wasn’t a reason to do that. He could love me; everything he said could be true. It was just a matter of proof. But was there really a way to prove love?

Then it hit me. He’s gone; and he’s most likely not coming back this time. It wouldn’t matter if he could prove his love or not, he wouldn’t have the chance. And there was no opportunity standing right outside that door; only pure emotion that would crumble me into a pile of dust. I would be blown away with the wind, scattered all over the planet; truly broken into a million pieces.

There was nothing, and there never could be. There was no way he would be back. Even if he wanted to, the Volturi would probably catch him first since he didn’t have Alice’s visions to warn him anymore. And the quest of finding him again probably wouldn’t work. The world is a big place and there was a small chance I would find him last time and an even smaller chance this time. My luck just wasn’t good enough to be that lucky again.

After the initial shock of my realization wore off, I was pulled straight back into the same depression I had gone through as a human. Only this time, it was intensified by the reoccurrence. I clutched my stomach and reignited the human habit that had been prevalent throughout that year without him. I fell to the hard wooden floor in an attempt to stabilize myself. I would’ve never thought I’d have to do such a thing once I became immortal, but now it all came flooding back to me in giant wave of sorrow. I wanted to be numb; to have no feeling whatsoever; no way to even comprehend the scene around me. I wanted to disappear into the air just as he seemingly had, and maybe then I could be as unfeeling as I wanted to be so desperately.

The numbness I was hoping for didn’t come, though. The only thing that came now was pure pain. It stung every inch of my body from my head to my toes, spreading its fire in a way even my transformation couldn’t have. This time, however, I knew that the torture would not and could not cease. All it could do was intensify until all I really was inside was a pile of burned up ashes surrounded by the hollow shell of what used to be considered a person.

All the emotions I had experienced as a human were strengthened even more by the new being I had become. I was sure of the blank look in my eyes; the one that showed that I really didn’t have anything going on in my head; the one I knew had been on my face that night in the forest. That face conveyed the things going on in my head perfectly. There was nothing going on in my mind, no numbness. The searing pain was overcoming, but it was familiar enough that all it did was incapacitate me. Of course, even as familiar as it was, it burned at the edges of my mind, turning everything I’d ever known right down to what the rest of my body would soon become while this went on: ashes.

I wish I could’ve cried. Even if it seemed childish, it felt right. I sobbed as I began to become slightly delirious.

Damn you fate! I said in my head to an imaginary person my mind as conjured up as fate. I have nothing and you won’t even let me cry?! Don’t you know what kind of pain heartbreak is? Would you quit throwing me into it? I can’t take much more!

My mind had now formed a face to go with the grim-reaper-esque body I had placed my imagining of fate into. It showed a truly evil person; one who kept giving me happiness and then pulling it out from under me. The man was also one to console me when I was down in a way. I could pretend that he was real, get mad at him, and then that just might be able to take away however small a portion of the pain I was going through right now. Sure, I was delusional, but it surely wasn’t a new thing to me. Not only was I accustomed to the oddities of the world, I fit in right along with them.

One oddity was brought to the forefront of my previously blank mind. The hallucinations. The ones of his voice back when I was human. There must be a way to stimulate those again! Sure, nothing was really dangerous to me now, but there just had to be something. Anything. If I couldn’t be with him there had to be a way to at least hear him. But the only thing, or people, that are dangerous to us are the Volturi. Oh my God, could I do that?

I thought back to my faint human memories of the voices. His voice, sometimes in just a faint whisper, other times full-on yelling. It was a glorious experience. The bliss of his voice mixed with the adrenaline rush had been absolutely exhilarating. The memories of the voices got louder and louder in my head as I completely tuned out whatever that noise was in the background.

Don’t you dare do that Bella! His yell echoed through my head in a delightfully satisfying gesture.

I was filled with momentary joy. He was back! I could hear him! But what was I stimulating this time? I couldn’t get the same adrenaline rushes anymore, and no danger was present. Could thinking about danger stimulate such a thing?

I thought about the Volturi ripping me apart before lighting a match and turning me into a bright orange flame letting off its mysterious purple smoke into all corners of the small room I’d been placed in.

No! Don’t do it! He yelled even louder this time. I sighed from the absolute joy that I could still hear his voice. I couldn’t stay away from the aftershocks of the present emotions for long though.

My breathing was now coming in short gasps, as if I had no air. There was no need for it, but it all of a sudden seemed to be a necessity. Such an inconsequential thing to me since I had been changed was now one of the most important things to me. I needed air to exist, everyone did. If it wasn’t there, then how could anyone live? There was no chance of anyone being here, even vampires, if there was no air. They would’ve never been born as humans. There would be no reason for anything, there would be nothing anyway.

That was the emotional turmoil running through me right now. What the world would be like without air seemed to be what my body was now. Completely vacant, hollow. Who would have known that such petty human emotions could be so much stronger as a vampire? That wasn’t what I had signed up for. Then again, my emotions had been pretty remarkable as a human anyway. I had been able to astound Edward with their levels.

The reality of things was slowly coming back to me. How was I going to get by now? There was no way I could live like this. I’d tried before, and failed miserably. It just wasn’t possible. How anyone else could have put up with it, I will never be able to figure out. My own personal Hell was not a very happy place at all. It was just exactly what its name called it: Hell.

The future was in no way predictable right now, no matter how Alice would like to think it is. It would never be and could never be for me. At least she had warnings for the misfortunes in her life; I never did.

I was about to think of another thing to possibly cure the returning hurt when Alice’s voice snapped me back to reality. I frowned at the loss of opportunity.

“Bella! Stop it!” Alice shouted. “Don’t let yourself go into that again!”

I looked up at her frantic face. “Go into what?” I asked, though I knew perfectly well what she was talking about.

“I know that look you have on, and it’s not good. You can’t just let yourself jump to such conclusions!”

Ok, now she really was confusing me. “What conclusions?” I questioned her.

“I may not be a mind-reader but I can sure as Hell see what’s going on in that head of yours right now. Don’t put yourself back to how you were. Get up and do something about it!”

“What do you want me to do, Alice?”

“Exactly what you did last time!” she exclaimed. “Except this time it will be far easier. I may not be able to see him where he is right this minute, but I know where he’ll be! Now c’mon!”

She grasped both of my hands away from my stomach, and threw them around her neck before hoisting my legs up around her hips. This seemed to be the only way I would get anywhere, strapped to someone’s back, since there was no way my legs would have been able to move by their own accord.

She took off into the cold, black night. There were no stars out tonight, as was appropriate. Just like the original incident. So many signs, all contributing to my grief. Could it be possible that fate really was my worst enemy?

Time seemed to fly by and we were soon crossing the border back into Spain, a seemingly uneventful place previously. Now it seemed to be life or death. Like I really would crumble into a pile of dust if we didn’t find him here. It seemed as if I would anyway. He just outright left, so why is she even bothering to go get him? He left her and Jasper there too; obviously he cares for this woman more than he does the three of us. Either that or he has questionable ulterior motives. Speaking of Jasper, I heard a faint yelling in the back of my mind.

“Bella!” Jasper yelled in exasperation, very uncommon for immortals. “Please stop! I can’t take it! You’re fine, you shouldn’t be depressed, or afraid, or anything like that! You should be angry, but nothing more. I can’t take much more of what you’re feeling. It’s painful.”

“See?” Alice piped up. “Even he doesn’t need to be a mind-reader to see what’s going on with you. You may think it’s not obvious, but trust me, it is.”

I frowned at the way her facts played out. I didn’t want to be easy to read. I wanted to suffer on the inside, not cause the people around me to suffer. They didn’t deserve any of this.

Alice stopped at the sight of a rather old yet elegant building. Did all vampires love elegant houses? Didn’t anybody want to live normally?

Alice pushed me off of her back and onto the ground; spinning around at the same time to steady me from what she knew would be wobbly legs.

“Thanks,” I whispered almost inaudibly.

“Anytime,” she whispered back. I nodded and took a deep breath before I asked her what I was dying to know.

“Is he in there?”

“Yes,” she replied. “But be careful, he’s not alone. You’ll have to be very discreet. Please try to stay safe.”

“I will.”

I squared my shoulders, once again taking a deep breath. The calming thing didn’t seem to be working too well, but the more possibility of a calm state, the better my chances were. I had to go in there and get Edward. There might be a chance, Alice certainly thought so. Then again, when wasn’t Alice optimistic?

Whatever, I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.

I kept chanting to myself until my feet seemed to feel strong enough to move. I slowly took a step forward, and when everything seemed to have gone alright, I took another. Soon, I was going at a leisurely pace. Why was I always calm when facing danger, and never anywhere else? My feelings sure are messed up…

I cracked open the door just the tiniest amount. He had to be in there. Hopefully I could see him from far away. I peered in with no purchase. Of course, it couldn’t possibly be that easy.

I pulled the door open just enough for me to silently step my foot in. I had to open it just a little more to get the other one in. I left it open once I was in so that there was no chance of any creaking of it to cause noise and make my presence known.

I walked silently through the stone hall, paying great attention to my every footstep. This was not the time to die because of carelessness. There was a turn just up ahead. Surely I would be able to see something around that corner. Otherwise this place was a lot bigger than I had thought. I’d already spent about ten minutes getting down that hall. I had been being careful and going slow, but it was still an awfully long hall.

I came to the corner and I took just the tiniest peek around the corner, not letting more than just a small fraction of my head out to take in the scene. The tiny amount was enough to see so much.

It was the Volturi. All of them. Every single one, with a new addition. Edward was standing by Aro’s side, his eyes blank and staring straight ahead. There was no emotion to his face. Nothing at all. I’d never seen him like that. He’d always been one to show at least a little of how he was feeling, no matter how minimal. He couldn’t be like that. So empty, so vacant of life. It just wasn’t him. He didn’t even seem to be sad that we were not together, as mine emotions were clearly written on my face.

Maybe he was happy; maybe he liked being part of their guard. All the maybes in my life were making me anxious. I just couldn’t take it anymore.

That expression was frightening to look at. It was as I imagined my face might’ve looked when I was able to be numb. The one now gracing my features was one that was merely horrified.

I peeked one more time around the corner just to check to see which of my suspicions could be correct, if at all. . What I saw proved my second set of worries. The sides of his lips were turned into a slight smile, barely there, but still a smile.

It couldn’t be. How could he be smiling? I’d never known him to be on good terms with the group he was now standing with and now he was smiling? What have they done to him? It’s not natural, not right. The man I had known to be the love of my life had drastically changed.

I sunk to the floor and curled up into what had been the ever-present ball the last year. I clutched my chest as tight as I could, practically begging in my thoughts to just be put out of my misery. This was not the kind of reassurance I had been looking for when Alice put me through that door.

I would forever be haunted by the horrendous memory. There was no way to erase it from my mind. How could this ever be put right?

Louder, louder
The voices in my head
Whispers taunting
All the things you said
Faster the days go by and I'm still
Stuck in this moment of wanting you here
Time
In the blink of an eye
You held my hand, you held me tight
Now you're gone
And I'm still crying
Shocked, broken
I'm dying inside

Where are you?
I need you
Don't leave me here on my own
Speak to me
Be near me
I can't survive unless I know you're with me

Shadows linger
Only to my eye
I see you, I feel you
Don't leave my side
It's not fair
Just when I found my world
They took you, they broke you, they tore out your heart

I miss you, you hurt me
You left with a smile
Mistaken, your sadness
Was hiding inside
Now all that's left
Are the pieces to find
The mystery you kept
The soul behind a guise

Where are you
I need you
Don't leave me here on my own
Speak to me
Be near me
I can't survive unless I know you're with me

Why did you go?
All these questions run through my mind
I wish I couldn't feel at all
Let me be numb
I'm starting to fall

Where are you?
I need you
Don't leave me here on my own
Speak to me
Be near me
I can't survive unless I know you're with me

Where are you?

I need you

Don’t leave me here on my own
Where are you?
I can’t survive unless I know you’re with me

You were smiling

~Haunted by Kelly Clarkson