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Jealousy

Summary:
This story takes place during Eclipse when Bella takes off to see Jake after she finds out that she doesn't have to work. It's from Edwards perspective.


Notes:


2. Chapter 2. Advice from Alice

Rating 0/5   Word Count 1790   Review this Chapter

I almost didn’t call you Edward. Her thoughts reached out loudly through the forest. Get yourself over here right now!

I ignored her.

So help me, I’ll chase you the whole way to the reservation if you don’t!

I had no choice. Alice showed me where she sat in my car on the road that cut through the boundary line. I turned out of the forest and headed toward her. I opened the driver’s door to her livid face. Her nostrils flared as she moved over and made room for me.

“Thanks Alice. I’m…I’m sorry for yelling at you on the phone.”

“I know, I know. I can’t say I am too pleased with myself either. What ever crap you told Emmett and Jasper must have been a good. I especially can’t believe you convinced Jasper that you would behave yourself.” I, on the other hand, am not that easily fooled.

I snarled at her in response.

“I was going to call Jasper and tell him, but then I would have just had to deal with all three of you idiots.”

“I’m just going to sit here until she comes out.”

I’m not leaving you alone in this car. She sat in the passenger seat with her skinny arms crossed over her chest.

“Yes, you are.” I growled back at her

.

“Edward, I’ve already lost Bella from my view, I will not lose you as well.” You know what it will mean if you cross the line.

Alice’s eyes shifted focus. Her vision swayed between me brooding in my car to blackness.

“She’ll be fine”

“You can’t know that.” I snapped at her “What if one of those wolves loses control?” What if he kisses her? What if she likes it?

“I don’t like her with those dogs anymore than you do, but I have faith. I have faith in Bella. If only you could have a little faith in yourself." She shook her head scowling. "It will be alright.”

I knew that she was trying to comfort me, but she could have been talking to the dashboard for all the good it was doing.

“Nobody wants a war. I can’t guarantee you’ll be able to stop yourself.” Do you want to do that to Carlisle?

Like Jasper, she knew where I was vulnerable. My father and also my mother were still recovering from what I had done to them with my trip to Italy. My head dropped.

Her vision was changing. Emmett, Jasper, they were fading out of her site. They must be deciding to intercede. Things shifted again. Now the rest of my family followed them into the blackness.

"Edward!"

I was concerned for her safety, but I knew deep down that wasn’t why I wanted to find them. Apprehension about Alice’s vision overrode my jealousy. Being the possible cause of my family getting hurt would keep me here. Alice’s vision cleared some. She figured about a ninety percent chance I would keep myself out of trouble.

“This doesn’t mean I won’t still be watching.” Alice glared at me.

“Go home. I promised them and I promise you, I will do nothing on my own. Besides, Emmett will be mad if I start chewing up werewolves without him” I forced a smile onto my face, trying to calm her fears. It seemed to have some effect.

“Alright, I’m leaving, but I won’t be far”

I wouldn’t admit to Alice that protecting Bella was not my primary goal. I didn’t want her to know that I was jealous and weak. She wouldn’t understand. She always thought me better than I was, just like Esme. But my mind was consumed with one questioned. What if Bella did want him? The idea was agonizing. I thought about my first reaction when Alice called… my anger for her disobeying me... I was angry and hurt that Bella would do this to me. It was wrong of me to think like that, to treat her like a child. I didn’t own her. Part of me knew it wasn’t right of me to force her to stay away from him, but it didn’t lessen the resentment or the pain. It was my fault that she had found comfort from this mongrel to begin with. I had sewn these seeds and now I was reaping my reward. His goals were as simple as mine. He wanted her. He would do whatever was in his power to get her, to take her from me….

My rage erupted so strongly that I couldn’t think straight. My head pounded, I felt sick to my stomach because I wasn’t in motion. I needed to siphon off this aggression.The minutes ticked on as I contemplated various ways to dismember a large werewolf. He was a young one too, young and volatile. I thought about what could happen if Bella got in an argument with him. Years ago I had seen in Ephraim Black’s mind the transformation process. It could happen spontaneously. All it took was a temper flare up. A small argument could easily set a younger wolf exploding, anything nearby became collateral damage. As I thought about how easy she was pushing my buttons and she wasn’t anywhere near me, my hand went to the door. I couldn’t sit in my car any longer. I had to know she was safe. I had to find him. I decided to get out of the car and look for them both.

My phone vibrated. Alice… I picked up

“Ok, ok Alice. I’m not going to do it.” I snapped the phone shut before she could respond.

The phone rang two more times in that long hour. I didn’t pick up. I didn’t want to talk to her. I was annoyed at Alice as much as I was grateful for her interceding. She was right of course; maybe that was part of my irritation. I was sure as soon as she picked up the phone to dial my number her vision cleared. I knew that if I answered I would just vent on her. There was no need to be cross with my sister when she was only helping. So I just sat there fuming.

Finally her truck came around the corner. I spun out from my hiding place. In seconds my bumper was glued to hers. She glanced once in my direction through her rear view mirror, her eyes wide with fear… or was it guilt. Apparently I was not wearing a pleasant expression. She shuddered and looked straight ahead from that point on. She didn’t pull off as I expected her to. My jealousy was at full boil. As we came into town she didn’t head home. I wasn’t sure where she was leading me then I remembered, she was supposed to help Angela after work today. This only got me madder. She wasn’t even going to acknowledge my presence, was she? Fine then, if that’s how she wants it. She had to go home sometime. I followed her to Angela’s house…I wasn’t so angry that I didn’t want to make sure she made it there safely. She didn’t look up as I drove by. I went straight home, and dropped my car off.

Alice was waiting for me in the garage.

“I called Jasper and Emmett and told them to take their time.”

“Thanks Alice” my tone didn’t sound grateful, but I was.

“Why don’t you talk to her about it?”

“Talk to her about what Alice?”

This isn’t just about her safety and we both know it.

“Alice!”

“She needs to know how you feel Edward. I don’t need psychic ability to see this jealousy eating you up. I don’t blame you for feeling deceived, but you haven’t made your feelings about this clear. Bella loves you. You know she wouldn’t purposefully do anything to hurt you. But you hide too many things from her. I know you think you are protecting her, but it’s dishonest and it’s not fair to her.”

She did know me well. “I don’t know what to do Alice.” My eyes started to sting. “I get crazy when she even mentions his name. All I can think about is hunting him down and shredding him to pieces. But I’m far angrier with myself than I am with him. I know it’s my fault for her wanting to be with him in the first place. He has saved her life… twice. I know I don’t have the right to object, not even to the fact that he is trying to take her from me. And he is human.”

Alice raised a black eyebrow.

“More human than me.” The words caught in my throat. “If she was with him, she wouldn’t suffer unending thirst. She wouldn’t have to spend eternity fighting against what she had become. He could give her a somewhat normal life. She wouldn’t have to move on every few years. She wouldn’t lose her mom and dad. And he can protect her Alice, he’s proven that.”

Alice took a step closer and gave me a hug. “Edward, this isn’t your choice to make. Remember what happened that last time you tried that?”

“I know, I know. I won’t do that again.”

“Just don’t hide your feelings from her. It’s not good for either of you.”

“I know.”

“You’ve got a couple of hours before she gets home.” You’re a mess. “Go change.”

I looked down at the damage my roll down the hill with Emmett had done to my clothes and smiled.

Alice jumped up and pulled a couple leaves from my hair. “Rosalie is gonna be pissed at you for trashing Emmett’s new jacket.”

“He provoked me. Besides, I hardly think you mind the excuse to buy him another.”

“Good point.” Alice grinned.

“Thanks Alice.” I gave her a big squeeze and a kiss on top of her spiky black hair.