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Another Word for Lonely

Summary:
Thank you to Oh Mike, How will I go on for the amazing Banner!!! Go read her stories :) Bella's a half Vampire and half human, daughter of Aro, a secret that is to be kept at all costs. She moves away, disgusted from her life in Volterra, to Forks to start fresh. There, she runs into the Cullen's, who don't have any idea what she is, or who she's the daughter of. What happens when she falls for Edward, and Edward for her? And what will happen when Aro summons her back home? Who is in danger, Bella or the Cullens? AU Slightly OOC BxE


Notes:


3. Steady

Rating 5/5   Word Count 3702   Review this Chapter

I had safely arrived at the Cullen's house, but that had only frightened me more. Their house, or mansion rather, was huge! I reluctantly walked up the steps to their front door, walking in as Edward held the door open for me. I was amazed by thier house, it was so...so normal. It defintily wasn't what the average Vampire lived in. I was greeted by an assembly line. I recognized his sister Alice, who was tucked under the arm of a tense looking blond haired man. Then I saw the large intimidating brunette standing next to a drop dead gorgeous blonde, and I had remembered seeing them at school as well. And closest to us were two people I had yet to meet, a blond man in his late 20's and a pretty woman who seemed about the same age, holding hands.

"Hello Bella, welcome to our home.My name is Esme." The woman with caramel colored hair standing closest to me said. She slowly moved forward to shake my hand and I obliged. She smiled warmly at me, and I couldn't help but return the smile. Next, the man she had been holding hands with introduced himself as Carlisle, and then Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper, and I had already met Alice. It was still awkward, for we had yet to move out of the foyer, but eventually Esme pushed us all into the living room. I sat in a chair that was by itself in the corner of the room. Emmett sat on the arm of the sofa, Rosalie sitting next to him on the sofa. Alice crossed her legs on the floor and sat there, while Jasper stood behind her. Carlisle and Esme sat on a love seat, and Edward reluctantly sat on the sofa, a few spaces away from Rosalie. They were all staring at me expectantly.

"Soo...What would you like know?" I asked hesitantly, figeting in my seat. I walked in to this meeting intending to let them only know what I was, but not the hows. I figured the easiest possiblity would be to confirm that I was a half-breed, but I would feign ignorance on how I became one. That was the dangerous part of my secret, how you created a half-breed. Hopefully they would just assume that half-breeds just were, as like their own existance.

"We're sorry dear for making you so uncomfortable, I know this must not be easy." Esme smiled sympathetically at me.

"It's okay, I understand that I seem unusual to you, but I hope that at the end of this, we can work out an arrangement so that we can both stay in peace." I said hopefully. I could see Alice jumping excitedly in place, a smile gracing her lips. She glanced at Edward, who only looked away thoughtfully. I wonder what she had seen? "Please, ask away, but I hope to express to you that you may choose to ask, and I may choose not to answer." I admitted. "But I will answer as thruthfuly as allowed, I will not lie to you." I said.

"How do we know that she won't lie? We can't trust her." Rosalie sneered.

"You seem to forget that we have 2 lie detectors in the family." Edward pointed out. Huh?

"

"But I can feel her, and I'll be able to notice if something is not right." The one named Jasper said. Feel her?

"What do you mean read and feel her?" I asked, confused.

"I can read minds Bella, everyone except...yours. And Jasper has the ability to feel the emotions of others." Edward explained.

"So you mean that he knows exactly how I feel at this very moment?" I asked regarding Jasper.

"Yep." Alice chirped.

"Oh... wow. This should be interesting. Let's get this over with." I said, now even more nervous.

"You're very similar to Vampire nature, but why do you have a heartbeat?" Caslisle asked.

"I...I don't know, honestly. This is how I've always been, I never had anyone to explain this to me." I said, it was partly the truth. I didn't know why I had the attributes I had.

"Why do you drink blood?" Alice asked. How did she know? "Edward filled us in."

"The same answer, it's just what I need to survive. I can go weeks with out it, sometimes months. But I crave it and it becomes uncomfortable without it. I've tried foregoing it all together, but it was almost deadly the time I tried, so I just take from the blood banks where I can find them." I said. "I do eat human food however, there are still nutrients that I need from it, besides, it's not all bad."

"Are you fast? What about strength, are you strong?" Emmett asked, getting excited now.

"Faster than the normal human, but proabably not as fast as you. And I can hold my own on strength." I said, not revealing that my power helped me with that.

"So since we know you don't know your origin, can you tell us what you do know about your nature?" Carlisle asked, intrigued.

"Um, well... I need blood obviously. And I do sleep, I know that you all don't. I have a heartbeat that beats faster than the normal person almost like a hummingbird, but I don't know why. My skin is just as hard as your's, and teeth just as sharp. I am venomous, but I don't know if its potent. I've never bitten a person before. And I don't sparkle." I said, smirking.

"Hey, hey now. We don't sparkle." Emmett defended his skin. She said the word sparkle like it tasted bad.

"You sparkle and you know it! I just shimmer. It's not noticeable to human eyes, but it is to yours." I said. Emmett crossed his arms, clearly hurt by my teasing.

"Do you have a special power?" Alice asked. I was surprised she hadn't seen anything about it yet. Maybe she didn't know, so I decided to keep that still a secret.

"Um...no..." I said after thinking about it.

"Liar." Jasper mumbled, smirking at me. "Who sparkles now?"

"Fine...I guess you could call me a shield. I can protect my mind from intrusion." I said.

"It explains why Edward can't read her." Esme smiled.

"And why it's hard for me to see her." Alice said. "I can see you, but barely. It's really blurry and kind of giving me a headache." She said, rubbing her temples.

"Sorry." I said, worried that I really had caused her pain. Jasper smiled at me.

"She's fine Bella. She just says headache because she's so used to seeing the future and is irritated when she can't." He reassured me. I was amazed at how I didn't want any harm to befall her, or any of them for that matter. And then I rememebred something, something I had wanted to ask them.

"Why do you have gold eyes and not red?"

"We didn't choose to be Vampires Bella, so we decided to do what we could with what we were given and so we only feed off of animals. Their blood makes our eyes golden." Edward explained to me.

"Hmm... does it taste good?" I asked.

"Not really, but it's enough to keep the blood lust at bay." he said.

"Why not just do what I do?"

"We'd rather not tempt ourselves with human blood at all." Carslisle said. "And we must also warn you, there are lands here that none of us may enter, including you." He said seriously.

"What?"

"Years ago, there had been a tribe of shapeshifters here that were dedicated to keeping the inhabitants of this land safe. We made a treaty with them, that they were to leave us alone, if we would not hunt on their land or hurt any of the people. We are also not allowed to go on to their land even to visit, as part of the treaty. Do you understand this?"

"Yes, but what are the boundries, I'll have to know so I don't wander too far."

"We'll have Alice explain it all to you later. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to return to work/" He said, getting up from his seat.

"Work?" I asked.

"Yes, I'm a doctor at the local hospital." Was this man serious? I tried to hold in my laughter, but I was unsuccessfull.

"That's...Ironic." I blurted out. Everyone couldn't help but join me, everyone except Rosalie.

"Yes, well. I enjoy helping others. I've become rather desensitized to the smell over the years." And then Carlisle left for work. Esme also got up and decided to run to the store to pick up a few things they claimed to be running low on. Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper and Alice all said that they were over due on a good hunting trip, and so it was only Edward and I after awhile.

We awkwardly sat on the couch, neither one of us saying much in the way of conversation. I started picking at the non existant dirt under my nails as something to do, until I heard a car driving about half a mile away with it's windows down, blasting music. I tuned into the song, recognizing it immediatly, and I couldn't help but blurt out, "I love that song."

Edward shifted in his seat and stood up. He walked over to the piano that was in one part of the room and suddenly began to play the song that was just on the radio. It was the best rendition I had ever heard of this song. Someone needs to tell Bloc Party that 'Sign's' should definitly be redone on piano... The music flowed from his fingertips, a perfect melody. I listened as he played the entire song, both of us in silence. After about 4 minutes, he brought the song to a close and looked up at me, meeting my gaze. He timidly smiled, and looked back down to the keys of his piano. I was awe struck by the talent he possesed.

"Bravo! That was... brilliant, amazing, beautiful, and..and I can't even think of words good enough to explain it!" I said clapping.

"Thank's, but I find it slightly hard to believe you." He smiled shyly.

"Where's Jasper when you need him?... It was amazing Edward, I loved it." I said. "Have you heard that song before?"

"Yep, it's a favorite of mine too. For being quite new, they have a brilliant sound. Almost as good as The Strokes." He said.

"'Is This It' is definitly one of the greatest albums of all time." I agreed. "What other music do you like?" I asked, intrigued. Music was one of the things that I truly geeked out over.

"Why don't you come up to my room and I'll show you." He said, walking towards the stairs.Was it wrong that I had hoped he had been talking about something else besides music?... I followed him up to his room, which had a huge glass wall facing the forest and an even bigger wall opposite that filled with music. I noticed he had a white lounger near a window and a few furniture pieces and a very expensive looking stereo system. Music was definitly the focal point of this room. I scanned his selection, all ranging from LP's, cassettes, CD's, everything you could imagine music coul dbe on was here. And he had every genre imaginable. This was truly my heaven. I was completely immersed in his collection, ooh and ahh-ing to everything that I saw. He sat next to me on the floor, pulling out things he thought I'd like, placing new cd's in his stereo, or describing to me bands I would show him the cover of. I hadn't even noticed when the sun went down and that it was pitch black outside, his lamp just automatically adjusted to the room. He had shown me some of his rarer collections, some even worth thousands. It wasn't until he brought out a ridiculously rare Edith Piaf Vinyl album that I fully geeked out. He began to slide it from the wall, and I could already see what beauty he was about to show me. I had been looking for this album for years, price was not an option. But there were only 7 known copies, and I wanted it the right way, so I was not about to steal one. I gasped and I lunged at him, reaching my arm out to see the beautiful vinyl myself. I landed on top of him, his back on the floor and my body resting on top of him, holding the vinyl. I sat up, and hugged it to me, relishing in the feel of holding this rarity. I heard Edward clear his throat and I suddenly realized the situation. I was sitting on top of him, straddling his waist, hugging a vinyl record, in a dress.I quickly scrambled off, flushing at embarrasment st my actions.

"I'm so sorry! I tend to geek out with music and Edith Piaf is one of my favorites, and I saw that you had this and I had to see it for myself, I'm so sorry." I apologized, turning darker shades of red as the seconds ticked by. He chuckled, sitting back up and sitting indian style like me.

"It's okay, I comepletly understand. It's Edith, no other words needed." He smiled.

"Atleast you understand." I smiled back. We continued in the same fashion, talking about music, listening to anything and everything, we were bonding. That is...until my stomach started growling. I hadn't eaten since I got home from school and I checked the clock at it was well past 10pm.

"Hungry?" He smirked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes actually."

"Come on, lets get you something to eat." He said, standing up. He took my hand and helped me to my feet and I stretched my legs.

"Hey, I have an idea. Why don't you show me your kind of hunting?" I asked, raising an eyebrow at him this time, a smirk playing on my lips.

"I don't know if you'll like our kind of hunting Bella." He said, his brow furrowing.

"Well, I'll never know until I try now won't I?" I said, taking a running jump towards his open window. I casually and elegantly landed, and looked over my shoulder to see him standing at the ledge watching me, his jaw slack, as if he were expecting me to have broken my legs or something. "Aren't you coming?" And I took off towards the woods, listenting to Edward run behind me, slowly gaining speed. I stopped about 5 miles in, and waited for him. Not a second later, he was there in front of me.

"Are you really serious?" He asked.

"Yep. What do I do?" I asked, I had never hunted animals before.

"Who knew that I would be teaching you how to hunt this evening when we first met this morning?" He said incredulously.

"Yeah, I was certain you'd try to kill me first." I joked.

"Me too." He said thoughtfully, obviously not realizing I was joking.

"Hey!" I said, feigning hurt.

"Just kidding. It's just that, we've crossed alot of bridges in just a span of a few short hours." He said surprised. "You've taken all of this so smoothly, I'm almost expecting you to be gone by morning."

"True, we have crossed alot of bridges today. But remember. we're Vampires, our minds work faster, so we accept faster, trust faster, adapt faster, bond faster. If I were human, this would have taken... oh lets say, at least 4 months." I said lightly. "Come on, tell me what to do." I said, becoming impatient.

"Alright. First you have to locate a worthy animal. Emmett prefers bears, I prefer mountain lions. But a deer is pretty basic too. Once you locate it, single out it's scent and let the monster inside you take over. Let your senses become one with the scent, let your blood lust consume you. Then...you attack. Once the blood lust is fully in control, your body just follows." He explained.

"Okay, so...locate a smell, got it." I said sniffing the air. "I smell...grass, and...mud...hmm, and wet fur?...Yeah, wet fur." I said, describing what I could smell. "What is that horrible smell?" I asked.

"Elk."

"Is that a good choice?" I asked, crinkling my nose.

"It will do." He said laughing at my expression. "Single out his heartbeat Bella, it will help."

I listened to what he had said earlier and tried to let the blood lust consume me. I ran, coming closer to the smell. I was only about 50 feet away, hidden from view. I took in the scent, letting it consume. The monster was rattling the cages inside me, but it wasn't opening the door. I was confused, shouldn't this be default or something. I could feel Edward not too far from me, watching me. My blood lust wasn't working, it wasn't taking control the way he said it would. I became flustered, why could he hunt and I couldn't? I imagined Edward, leaping at the Elk, taking it down. In my mind, I could see his muscular perfect body overtake the animal as it fought, I could see the veins in his neck flex as he bit the animal, draining it of it's blood. A shudder ran through me as I imagined his perfect arms cradling the animal, holding it tightly as he drank. I could only imagine what it felt like to be in his arms, his perfect lips on my skin and it ran another shudder through me. What surprised me was how, in my day dream, I was not jealous of Edward's skill at hunting, but rather I was jealous of the fact that the Elk was in Edward's arms. Just the thought that it was possible for the Elk to make Edward lose control, lose all sense of right and wrong because of the blood lust that the elk could inspire, drove me wild. Suddenly I sprang at the Elk, breaking its neck with a quick snap and was draining it dry before I knew what had happened. I was finished shortly there after, and looked up. Edward was leaning casually against a tree, but the color of his eyes were less than causal. His eyes were jet black.

"Um, sorry. I guess you were right when you said you just lose yourself." I said. "I think there's some over there if you're thirsty." I offered, pointing behind me.

"I had never seen anyone lose control quite like that before, it was truly...intoxicating." he breathed.

"Edward, your eyes are black, you should probably hunt since were out here." I said, feeling self-conscious under his gaze..

"I'm not thirsty." He said walking over to me. I started to breathe a little bit faster. Where was he going, why was he looking at me like that. If he wasn't thisrty, then why were his eyes black? "You have...you have a drop on your chin." He said pointing at my chin. I wiped it off. He was still looking at me closely, or my lips rather, and I was starting to wonder what was going to happen. "Bella, you still have some on your lip...do you...do you mind if I..." He said slowly, leaning in a bit closer. He leaned in so close that I could feel the chill from his lips ghosting over my own. Ever so painfully slowly, he placed his soft lips over the corner of my own, placing a light kiss there as he licked up the drop I had not managed to wipe off. He leaned back and gave me a crooked smile that was to die for. He turned and began to walk back towards the house. I didn't move, I couldn't move after that. I was in complete 'after-kiss' shock. Actually, this was my first kiss, so it was even more shocking for me. I just had my first kiss with Edward Freaking Adonis Cullen! He walked about 15 feet then turned to me. "What's the matter?" He asked, wondering why I hadn't moved.

So quickly, even I had a hard time registering I did it, I leant down and swiped my finger at one of the puncture wounds I had left, getting a couple drops of blood and smearing it on my lips again. I smirked at him playfully, daring him to wipe it off again. I recieved a chuckle from him. "We could be at this all ngiht." he said, laughing.

"I dearly hope so." I said right back.

"Come on Bella, we've both got school tomorrow, and you need some sleep." He said, starting to run back to his house. I pouted and licked my lips clean, realizing that animal blood was not very appetizing. I reached the house seconds after he had and walked in after him. I grabbed my purse, jacket, and keys and made my way to the front door, opening it. I heard him chuckle again.

"What's so funny?" I asked.

"You. Really, you had to resmear blood on your lips just to get me to kiss you again?" He laughed again.

"Obviously it didn't work. I didn't know what else to do." I said, emabarrassed and pouting.

"You could have just asked me to."

"That's just...no. I would never. But if I had, would you?" I asked casually.

"Hmm, I don't know... Would it mean that we're going steady?" He smirked, raising one perfect eyebrow. I nudged him with my elbow.

"Ha, steady... Why don't you just give me your letterman's jacket," I joked.

"I don't have one." He laughed.

"Oh well... Maybe Mike Newton does, he does seem like the type..." I trailed off. I felt an inner satisfation when I heard Edward growl. "See you tomorrow! And tell Alice thanks for the fashion advice, I must say, I did like the reaction." I walked away and smirked devilishly over my shoulder at him.

I left him standing on his porch, his hands in his pockets, as I sped as fast as I could towards the main road.