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New Moon: Edward's version

Have you ever wondered what happened to Edward after he left Bella in the forest? What was he thinking when he searched her room for physical proof he exists? How did the other Cullen's react? Were Edward and Bella the only sufferer's of the break up? Here are some answers....

Alright, here is what I think happened and I'm pretty proud of what I've written so please review!! I don't feel this is going anywhere anymore, so I've ticked the completeed box and that's the end of that. HOWEVER if you are desperate for this to be finished, leave me a review and I'll see what I can do, because I know how much it sucks if you're enjoying something and it never gets finished. Lots of love, SparklyCullen xxx

4. Prologue: Decisions

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“What are you thinking about?” asked Bella as she settled down to sleep. Her full brown eyes watched me warily, framed by long, beautiful chocolate swirls of hair.

I hesitated before responding honestly. “I was thinking about right and wrong actually.” Was it right to stay here, in Forks, with Bella, when doing so would inevitably lead to her death or her losing her soul forever? Was it wrong to leave when we both depended on the other? When our lives revolved around us being together?

Was it right to damn Bella to a life like mine? Sterile, bloodlust and never ending; a regret to all of us. Was it wrong to keep her human and destroy myself when the end of her life came, when doing so would destroy my family also?

Bella, obviously sensing the resignation in my tone, changed the subject. “Remember how I decided I wanted you not to ignore my birthday?”

I sighed, expecting her subject to be leaning towards the damnation of her own soul.

“Yes.” I answered, as I did remember.

“Well, I was thinking, since it’s still my birthday, I’d like you to kiss me again.”

“You’re greedy tonight,” I said, glad she had presented me with the perfect opportunity to say a physical goodbye.

“Yes I am,” she agreed, before adding on an afterthought. “But please, don’t do anything you don’t want to do.”

“Heaven forbid that I should do anything I do not want to do,” I muttered under my breath, leaning in. I kissed her with the usual level of caution and, predictably, Bella began to push the boundaries, trying to get the most out of my tight restrictions.

Tonight, I had decided, would be our last night together. After this, her safety would come far before my personal satisfaction. So, knowing this would be the final time I could openly allow myself to present my love for her, I granted her unspoken permission to overstep our usual rules.

Our kiss deepened as she took advantage, pressing her warm body against my frozen one through the thin duvet. I held her soft head to mine, trying to keep my concentration about me for her own safety, as my solid fingers brushed through the soft, smooth hair on her head.

I could hear her heart racing faster: two, three times a second. Her blood pumped loudly, temptingly, from her rosy cheeks, expelling burning heat from her face and into my sore, aching throat. I focused on not killing her by imagining the all too clear image of her dead in my arms, my eyes a searing shade of red.

Eventually the bloodlust became too much. I sucked every last second out of my self control, before breaking the kiss rather than her skin. We were both breathing hard and Bella flopped back onto her mattress, an underlying tone of serious thoughtfulness clouding her gaze as she tried to discreetly press her sore arm to my shoulder.

My Bella. I would not cause her harm again.