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Forbidden to Remember

Summary:
Forbidden to remember, terrified to forget; my life after Edward Cullen.Forbidden to remember; my life after the accident. Bella happily immerses herself in her hallucinations of Edward until her lack of concentration results in her riding off a cliff. Three weeks later she finds herself in hospital with amnesia. Bella can't remember who she is, who her friends are, why she looks so ill or who this Edward Cullen guy is. All she can recall is her life starting after her regaining consciousness in hospital three weeks after the accident. She knows Charlie is hiding something about her old life, but what she can't put her finger on... B/J and B/E. A story about destiny: Will a change of events affect Bella's final decision of who she should choose? 21.06.11 CHAPTER 12 "CONFLICT" IS UP!! I'M SO SORRY FOR THE DELAY, I CAME ON TODAY TO SEE WHAT WAS TAKING SO LONG TO VALIDATE AND NOT ONLY HAD THE CHAPTER GONE THROUGH, IT WAS MISSING THE STORY TEXT -.-" I AM SO SORRY BUT THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE ~ SparklyCullen


Notes:
Edward gets his wish; Bella living her life like he had never existed. But when he drops in to find Bella happy with Jacob, should he walk away or make his presence known? Will Bella ever regain her memory?


10. Essay

Rating 3/5   Word Count 3044   Review this Chapter

Mr Mason walked into the room as everyone sat down. I was getting looks of surprise and envy from everyone but Angela who seemed delighted of my company. Mike looked distraught and didn’t turn around once to speak with me.

“Today I want you to write an essay about your partner,” announced Mr Mason. “You’re working with whoever you’re sat next to and you have today’s lesson to work on it before it becomes homework for next Wednesday. You need to cover the basic facts such as name, age and birthday before moving on to family, personality and hobbies. Go.”

I turned to Edward and smiled shyly as he pulled a notepad towards himself. “Name?” he asked with a grin.

“Isabella Swan,” I answered, wincing at my full first name. He wrote it down neatly in perfect script.

“And how old are you, Bella?”

“Eighteen.”

“When’s your birthday?”

“Thirteenth of September.”

“Have you always lived in Forks?”

“No, I used to live with my mom in Phoenix.”

“What was it like there?” His topaz eyes met mine and knocked me breathless for a second.

I grimaced. “I don’t know... I was in an accident a while back.” Something flashed across his eyes for the briefest moment, but it was too sudden for me to identify.

“My turn,” I interceded before I had to give details. “What’s your full name?”

“Edward Anthony Masen Cullen.” His topaz eyes had hardened and were no longer anywhere near as warm as they had been previously.

I tried to hide my untidy scrawl from him, feeling intimidated by his perfect handwriting. “How old are you, Edward?”

He smiled slightly as though humoured by a private joke. “Almost eighteen.”

“When’s your birthday?” I asked automatically, not thinking of the paper.

“June twentieth,” he answered and after a small pause: “You might want to write that down.”

Flustered, I remembered why we were questioning each other. “Yeah, you’re right, sorry.” I scribbled down the details and he started firing more questions at me.

“Do you have any brothers and sisters?” he asked, his hand poised over the page as though he could anticipate the answer.

“No, I’m an only child. Do you?”

He smiled that crooked smile again. “I have four adopted siblings: Alice, Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett.”

“You’re adopted?” I asked surprised as I quickly noted down the information.

“Yes, I was orphaned a long time ago. My adopted parents, Carlisle and Esme, like to bring outsiders together. They adopted me first, followed by Alice and Emmett and then Esme’s nephew and niece became orphaned, so naturally they were welcomed into the family.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” I apologised, blushing at my mistake.

“Its fine,” he chuckled. “Carlisle and Esme are my parents now and our family couldn’t be closer if we were biologically related.”

“I can tell,” I observed quietly. “It’s obvious, the way you talk about them that you love them all. I always wanted an older brother or sister.”

Edward smiled but the light didn’t quite reach his eyes. “You can share mine if you like. I’m sure my siblings wouldn’t object.”

I blinked, trying to push away the dazzle of his immense beauty. “How old are they?” I asked.

Edward drew a deep breath. “Alice is the same age as me. Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie left high school last year and have gone to college, but they’re home at the moment due to a close family friend falling... ill.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” I muttered, cursing myself mentally for pulling up the awkward topics. “Who’s your friend? Do I know them?”

“No,” Edward shook his head, his topaz eyes filled with pain as they met mine. “I don’t think you do.”

I waited for him to expand, but instead he watched me, almost too closely as though expecting me to suddenly stand up and start screaming about something.

“Um...” I tried to think of another question. “Well, who do you get on best with?”

“Alice,” he spoke without looking away. “We work really well together.” He paused for a moment. “Usually,” he added.

I laughed. “What’s happened?” I asked sensing something had happened between them recently.

“Alice struggles to... mind her own business,” Edward answered, his smooth forehead crumpled as he tried to find the words. “And it can get irksome when she starts... interfering I suppose you could call it, with decisions you have made.” I could tell he didn’t want to discuss the disagreement with his sister, so I tried to turn the conversation around discreetly.

“What does she look like?” A recent memory was stirring in my head: Edward’s eyes widened in what could only be described as hope.

“She’s petite with short black hair,” he answered quickly, watching me as I thought carefully.

“I think I saw her yesterday...” I voiced and I noticed his butterscotch eyes hardened slightly in disappointment.

“Most probably,” Edward admitted with a shrug. “We arrived a couple of days ago and Alice wanted to have a look around our new neighbourhood. She won’t be starting for a couple of weeks because she’s extraordinarily close to the friend we’re visiting. I’ve enrolled earlier because I distanced myself from her a few months ago and I don’t believe she’s forgiven me.”

“Really?” I couldn’t see how anyone could hold a grudge against a man like Edward. “Why did you distance yourself from her?”

Edward’s grieved eyes met mine and I could feel myself floating off my chair. “I’m not good enough for her,” he stated bluntly. “She deserves much better than me.”

My heart dropped unexpectedly. He looked so forlorn that I made a stab to cheer him up. “I don’t think anyone could do better than you,” I admitted bashfully.

He smiled, his topaz eyes warming. “Thank you,” he murmured, pausing for a moment before adding: “Bella, would you-”

“Alright class, that’s today’s lesson over,” announced the teacher. “You have until next Wednesday. Dismissed.”

I packed my stuff away, noticing Edward waiting patiently for me. “I think we share lessons,” he smiled gently, offering his timetable to me for comparison. A quick glance proved him right. I swung my bag onto my back and as we left the room, I noticed Mike staring daggers at my English partner. I frowned, confused, but Edward seemed to be faintly enjoying the attention.

It happened again in biology. I looked for him at lunch but he was nowhere to be seen. I was one of the first to arrive in biology, so I took my seat and began to sort out my stuff for the lesson. Edward strolled in and approached my desk.

“Do you mind...?” he asked, nodding at the seat beside me. I shook my head and he took it without further discussion.

Mike came in seconds later with Angela. They were talking about him and Jessica getting back together I was sure. When Mike noticed that his usual seat was occupied, his face drained of colour and his fists clenched.

“That’s my seat,” suggested Mike, glaring at Edward.

“Is there a seating plan?” Edward stared back. Mike didn’t answer.

“Its fine, Mike,” I reassured him. Mike glared at me like he had been betrayed then shrugged and walked away. I glanced at Edward but he looked indifferent, so I turned back to the front of the class and began to take my books out.

“Protective isn’t he?” asked Edward casually, a vague look of smugness reaching his eyes.

I shrugged, grimacing inwardly. “I guess.”

“Looks to me like you have an admirer...?” I looked up and accidently met Edward’s topaz eyes full on. My mind reeled as I tried to answer in an acceptable manner.

“I don’t think I do,” I tried to argue. “He should know better if he does.”

“What do you mean?” Edward’s voice had the tone of curiosity, but his gaze was detached and unfeeling: a mask concealing the truth. I frowned, trying to understand what he was hiding.

“I – um, I guess I don’t feel the same way,” I said, evading the main reason. Why was I suddenly embarrassed about Jacob? I shouldn’t feel like this! I should be able to put my hands up and admit that I’m taken, but something I didn’t understand refused me the power to do so. “My friend Jessica has just broken up with him and things are a little awkward – I wouldn’t want to make things worse...”

Edward stared at me for a couple of seconds longer than was necessary. I swallowed loudly and turned around, my heart thudding. Eventually Edward seemed to swallow my excuse and faced the front also in time for Mr Banner to start the lesson.

Name: Edward Anthony Masen Cullen

Age: 17

Birthday: June 20th

Bio: Edward has bronze hair and a muscular slim physique. He’s an orphan and now lives with his adopted parents Carlisle and Esme Cullen. He has four adopted siblings: Jasper, Emmett, Alice and Rosalie, all of whom are close in age to him. He’s returned to Forks, Washington because of a local family friend falling ill which all of his family are very close to. He moved from....

I hesitated, absentmindedly putting the end on my pen in my mouth. Where had he moved from? Frowning, I tried to think back but I couldn’t remember discussing anything about his old home.

I looked up as I heard a snigger from the door. “What’s got you so strained, Bells?” asked Jacob as he came over to me and pecked me on the lips before lifting me up and sitting me on his knee. “Look at those frown lines!” He laughed, rubbing my forehead gently with his burning fingertips.

I laughed with him, relaxing immediately. “I have this English essay I need to do, but I don’t know enough to finish it.”

“What’s it on?” asked Jacob, craning his neck to get a glimpse of my homework, but I was folding it up and storing it in my folder.

“It’s about this guy I was partnered with in English this morning,” I told him, twisting round to kiss him again. “We have to write about someone in our English class to practice our essay writing skills.”

“Cool,” nodded Jacob. I glared at him and his suppressed laugh bubbled up. “Ok, ok, maybe slightly boring,” he teased, kissing me properly. I responded, forgetting about my essay as I enjoyed the moment.

Jacob drove me to school in his rabbit the next morning, promising to take me to the La Push beach when he picked me up later. After a sweet goodbye, I hopped out and forced myself not to skip into the building.

“Good morning, Bella.” I turned and lost my breath. Edward Cullen was smiling lopsidedly but his topaz eyes were tight.

“Good morning,” I gasped, watching with wide eyes as he fell into step beside me. “Um, how are you?”

“I’ve been better,” Edward shrugged. “But I’ve also been worse so I’m not about to argue. How are you?”

“I’m good,” I answered breathlessly.

“English next,” Edward noted. I nodded. “I’ll see you there,” said Edward, striding ahead. I watched him go, conflicting emotions confusing my brain. I shook them off and began to fill my locker.

The day passed quickly. Edward was in my every lesson, conveniently sat in every empty seat beside me. Mike left lunch ten minutes early but when I arrived in biology, Edward was sat relaxed in the seat he had sat in yesterday with a small smug smile playing on his lips. Mike was sat in his old seat, muttering darkly under his breath, his expression an angry storm.

“Would you like to come back to mine after school, Bella?” asked Edward Cullen politely when I took my seat. “Perhaps we could finish that essay? Since we only managed the basic facts during the lesson and haven’t even got on to our hobbies and personality yet.” He flashed a little smile at me and my face burned in response.

“Um,” I looked down into my bag trying to clear my suddenly clouded mind. “Yeah, sure.”

“Great!” Edward flashed me a smile that stopped my heart. Something scratched feebly in the recess of my mind about plans I’d already made, but I couldn’t focus enough to recall what it was.

Edward frowned, but there was something slightly smug behind his concern. “Is there something wrong, Bella?”

“No, I’m fine,” I assured him as Mr Banner slammed down his books on his desk.

“Today kids, we’re going to learn about the anatomy of the cell!” The class groaned and the teacher chuckled to himself. “Page one-eight-two: let’s get started!”

Edward met me outside the changing rooms at the end of the day. “Ready?” asked Edward politely, falling into step beside me. I had investigated the insignificant mental itch during my single Edward-free hour last thing and was feeling horribly guilty about forgetting about Jacob. I had internally debated dropping Edward and going with Jacob to make up for my forgetting about him, but then, I argued, I was always with Jacob and we’d discussed that if we needed to study alone one night we’d give the other that space. Yes, alright, I wasn’t working completely solitary, but the essay was important and definitely constituted as school work.

I chewied my lip a little as I wondered how I was going to call Jacob whilst driving. I decided I would call when I got there, perhaps then I could work out how long I’d be there and how long it would take to drive home. “My truck’s this way...”

I walked off in the general direction I had parked my truck that morning and noticed a silver Volvo parked up nearby. I surveyed the vehicle with confusion. I hadn’t seen that car before, who drove it?

The blonde girl Edward called Rosalie looked directly at me from next to the car. She was frowning disagreeably in my direction. I flushed again at being caught out and walked slightly faster. I glanced behind me to check she wasn’t glaring at somebody else and noticed Edward nod slightly. I peeked back at the girl but she had already climbed into the car, looking faintly unhappy.

I unlocked the truck and climbed into the driver’s seat. Edward walked swiftly around and climbed in. I bit down on my lip as my engine roared into life, not dissimilar to a tractor. I glimpsed sideways, apologetic, but Edward’s attention was elsewhere.

“What happened to your stereo?” asked Edward in pained concern as I pulled out of my space and exited school. “Who pulled it out?”

“Um, I don’t know,” I admitted, cursing my lack of memory. “I found an old stereo in my room that looked in good nick, so I was going to have that installed tonight, but this came up instead.”

“I’m sorry. My brother could install it for you if you like. Where is it?”

“It’s at home. Don’t worry about it, I can get it done anytime,” I assured him. Edward took one last glance at the void in my dashboard before giving me the directions to his house. We drove quietly for most of the journey, but it wasn’t really an awkward silence. Admittedly it was less natural than any pauses between me and Jacob, but nothing was, especially how ecstatic I was at the prospect of spending the evening with Edward. That was completely unnartual.

Edward pointed out a discreet lane and I took it. It was a long road with the occasional pile of chopped ferns, presumably for burning. I pulled up alongside the house and Edward began to get out. “Is it ok if I just cancel my plans? I won’t be two minutes.”

“Of course,” he agreed before climbing out, shutting the door behind him.

I dialled the number on my cell and waited. After four rings, Jacob picked up.

“Hello?” His familiar husky tone carried down the receiver.

“Jake? It’s Bella.”

“Hey, Bella! Where are you?”

“I’m going to be late, a few hours at least. I might not make it-”

“Why?” His voice was saturated with concern. “Bells, honey, you alright?”

“I’m fine, Jake, really, don’t panic!” I smiled at his overprotection. “It’s just homework. I didn’t finish that English essay I was telling you about, so I’ve gone to his because it’s due in tomorrow.” Edward had walked round and was opening my door. I mouthed my thanks and carefully tried to climb down one handed. Edward, realising what I was doing, held my other hand to support me.

“Oh, alright then.” That’s what I loved about Jake: he was so laidback. “Who’s your partner?”

“Edward Cullen, he only started today so I can’t add anything to it without him-”

“Cullen?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

“Bella get out of there.” His husky voice turned from strangled to a growl.

I blinked. “What?”

“Get out of there right now!” roared Jake. “Where the hell are you?”

“I’m at his,” I answered, glancing up at Edward to see if he had overheard, but his face was smooth. “Why what’s the matter, Jake?”

Silence echoed down the phone. “Jake?”

“How long are you going to be?” His words seemed strained, forced somehow. I didn’t like it.

“I don’t know,” I admitted. “Edward?”

He looked down at me and smiled weakly. “Yes, Bella?”

“How long do you think this is going to take?”

“No more than a couple of hours I should think.”

“Ok thanks,” I moved the phone to speak into the mouthpiece again. “He says no more than a couple of hours. Why?”

“Nothing.”

“Jake?”

“Just call me as soon as you leave, ok? And drive straight home. I need to talk to you about something.”

“Ok, Jake,” I said, although I now felt anxious and confused. “I’ll see you later. Love you.”

“Love you too, Bells. Stay safe.”

“I will. Bye.”

“Bye.” I hung up and sighed. Edward led me towards the modern house, glancing over his shoulder with an unnatural smile.

“Who was that?” He asked.

I sighed. “My boyfriend,” I admitted embarrassed. “I’m going to see him after this.”

“Cool,” shrugged Edward dismissively, holding the front door open for me. “Welcome to my home, Bella.”