Summer after graduation, Victoria is no longer a problem. And Bella decides to postpone the wedding until next summer. No worries, right?
14. Chapter 14
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It was about four when we got back to the dorm. Just spent the day studying , Alice was already looking up baby names online and try do decide if she want to be Aunt Alice, Aunty Ali or Aunty Alice. She was already driving me insane. It would be a few weeks before any test could be ran I confirm what we already know. So there was not point in bring it up to Edward yet. I had decided to tell Charlie at Thanksgiving, that way I could have a month or so to decide if I was gonna finish my first year here or transfer to the community college in Port Angeles after the break. When to tell Edward was the next problem. I figured I should just wait and tell my dad first then I tell Edward. So then there would be no shock when the wedding was called off. Alice was on the phone the Jasper when I came back from the bathroom filling him in on everything I had told her and what she knew. There was one good thing about Edward living off campus in his own apartment...he could not be around to hear Jasper's thoughts.
Over the next week we feel back into our routine, except now Alice was all over like a mother hen make me eat healthy. At first Edward thought it was odd but she played it off quite well. She told him it was flu season and I needed to stay healthy. He figured she had just read to many health pamphlets that were all over campus. By Wednesday I was beginning to wear down Edward keep asking me if everything was okay and the more I tried to convince him I was fine the more he pressed on. Telling him could not wait and I would just have to play it by ear with Charlie I could not go on in misery. Alice understood and supported me even thought she urged me to wait. On Thursday I called Jake to tell him I was gonna break the news to Edward once I was back in Forks on Friday. Me and Alice were heading back later then Edward that day. The plan was to go ahead to tell Edward and once the wedding was called off we would just tell Charlie that things between me and Jacob changed and we were involved so I called off the wedding and leave it at that for now. Once it was confirmed I was pregnant then we would tell Charlie.
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Alice called the Esme shortly after Edward head to Forks. She told her my feelings had changed and that I was coming by tonight to break things off. Alice advised Esme to have the whole family there in case Edward was to make any unforeseen decisions. Esme understood and promised to support me in my decision as well as Carlise and the rest of the family. I called Charlie at the station shortly before Alice and I left the dorm to tell him I would be late getting home and that I had to speak to Edward about something. Which I felt best to be done at his home with his family present rather at his apartment in Vancouver. Charlie seemed to understand and told me he would grab something to go at the diner for us to eat when I got back.
On the drive Alice and I sat in silence mostly, she held my hand as I tried to keep from trembling. Alice promised everything would be fine and as far as she could see Edward would keep his cool. We started talking about plan for next semester, she asked if we had to stay in the dorm or could we get an apartment off campus. I told her that I was not sure what my plans were yet. Still not knowing how Charlie was gonna react in a few weeks and if he was gonna make me drop out and get married or what. Alice sighed " You are 19 he can't make you get married or drop out."
I snickered " Well if he is helping with tuition he can make me do whatever he sees fit. Bedsides I don't want to disappoint him any more then I already have. If he wants me to marry Jacob then I will" I crossed my arms stared down at my feet. I knew Renee would more disappointed then Charlie after all the talks about how she wanted to have a better life then she had. And now I am headed down the damn path...daughter like mother!
We were silent for the rest of the drive when we reaches the Cullen house Edward was waiting outside for me with the rest of the family all in the kitchen. I figured Edward go wind of what was going on and he did not say anything when I approached him . I took of the necklace he gave me for my birthday and handed it to him without sating a word.
He took a deep breath before he spoke" Bella I don't understand, I thought we were happy. What happen........ please tell me I will do anything " He was trembling and I felt so guilty. I told him is was best if we went inside to continue discussion. Once inside the Cullen family all went upstairs leaving me alone with Edward in the Living room. I sat on the couch and Edward stood beside the fireplace with both hands on his head.
"Edward I am not sure myself were to begin but you need to know that after last weekend Alice could not see my future anymore. And I know you know what that means for me."
He looked towards the floor" Yeah, but why him, what changed Bella what can he give you that I can't?"
I I let out a small laugh as I spoke" Well Edward first of all he doesn't treat me like some porcelain doll, he shows me how he feels and he is very passionate about it. He can give me a life were I can grow old with my family and most of all he is giving me a child." I was hoping Edward would not question my last statement and just accept it.
I saw the confusion and hurt in his eyes" He is giving you a child...what the hell Bella? " Anger began to flare as the Cullen family all filed down the stairs into the living room. " Are you telling my you have had sex with Jacob.....Bella please tell he that's not what you are saying." His voice quivered.
I chock on my tears " Yes Edward I have" I felt the was no explanation just the simply truth. Edward moved towards the couch and as he did Alice immediately was by beside with Jasper on my other. He got right in my face and asked why. I did not not why I had done what I done. It just felt right at the time but I knew he would not except that as an answer. " Like I said Edward he doesn't treat me like a fucking Porcelain doll . He did not even try to satisfy me so I turned to Jacob who loves me just as much as you do. Sometimes I think he loves me more because he listen to me and my wants and desires. He can be just as dangerous as you but at least he makes love to me." I could feel all the built up anger rush to the surface. " For the few months we have been together more time then I care to count and every time is just as passionate as before. That's one thing we don't have....passion. No passion at all, because you don't allow it."
Edward step back towards the wall near the fireplace and slumped put against it. I spoke in a calm manner " Passion huh? That's what all this was about. So you are willing to throw everything we have away for passionate sex? Did you not think to realize that we can have all that an more once you are change?"
I knew he had a point but now there was more to this then passionate sex or sex at all for the matter" Edward there is more to this now then sex. Now there is a child involved. One created by Jacob and me." I felt the tears of guilt again.
Edward sat for a minute obviously processing what I had just said." How far along are you? He asked.
I stumbled on my words not sure how to respond ." Um...Well Alice thinks I happened last weekend when Jacob and I chose to have unprotected sex."
He nodded in understanding. "Well then we have time."
I was confused." Time for what?
"Bella I still love you and I can forgive you and I will still marry you if you agree to have it aborted."
He was serious. I was shocked it felt like someone had knocked the wind out of me. Alice wrapped her arms around me as I looked over at Esme and Rose. Not sure why but I felt complied to see their reaction. When my eyes met theirs I could feel them begging me not to go thru with it. I knew how much children meant the them both. And I realized right then how much it meant to me. Without another thought I spoke." No I won't do it." I was still in a daze as Esme and Rose rushed over to me. They both throw their arms around me. And then a thought ran thru my mind. If they stay here then Jacob and the pack can't age and move on. That's not fair to them or to Jacob and our new family.
I made a snapped decision I felt it did not need to be discussed with the pack. Even thought in involved them I felt they would not protest my request to the Cullen's. " Hey there is something else I want to talk about with all of you."
They all sat down near me Alice hand one hand leg, her mind must have been racing this was not something we had talked about. . "I love you guys , you are my family and you will always will be but if the pack is to also be my family I think it is only fair that they lead normal lives too."
Carlise was the first to speak after what seem forever." I understand Bella if you want us to leave we will, we want you to be happy."
I began to cry." I don't want you to go far, just far enough that they can stop phasing...I ....still want you around to visit and be part of my life." Edward left the room at that point I guess he finally realized I was not coming back to him. I am way I was glad but I still felt guilty.
"Bella..." I looked up it was Jasper he was not sitting on the floor in front of me."....please don't beat yourself up over all this. Don't feel so guilty. You have a right to be happy. Edward will be fine in time, he just has a lot to deal with right now. But he is not anger at you, in fact he is kinda relived."
With a confused look on my face I mumbled " Relived about what?"
Jasper half smiled " Relived that you chose life, but don't get me wrong he wishes it was someone other the Jacob. But you are still our little sister, we love you and Esme is tickled to death that she gets to play grandmother for a change."
A smile replace my guilt as I looked over at Emse's beaming face. Even Rose looked somewhat excited. Then Alice blurted out " Well I have decided I want to be called Aunty Alice" We all laughed as Emmett handed me a tissue. We all talked for a while mostly about how far they would need to move. We figured a couple hundred miles would be sufficient. Alice would stick around till her freshman year was complete, Edward insisted he go head and transfer. Which was fine by me. Alice was gonna move into Edwards off campus apartment at the beginning of the next term, I was still unsure After about an hour I said my goodbye for the evening and head home to Charlie.
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