What I've Done
What happened to Emily was an accident caused by the one person she loved. What if Nessie had a accident that shattered her world? What would happen? Who will be there to catch the broken pieces?
1. Chapter 1
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It was an accident, they told me. They told me it wasn’t supposed to happen. I believe that. What I don’t believe is that he would leave me after it happened. He left me in my blind state, a state that he put me in and yet I still love him. I would forgive everything that happened if he came back to me.
I am sick of school now that everyone treats me like I am made of glass or going to combust at anytime. My mom and dad won’t let me go around school without one of them or one of my aunts or uncles walking with me to make sure I don’t fall down steps or something. I know it’s for my safety, but I want to be able to be safe on my own.
He would have stopped them being so protective of me by being the only one to walk with me, that is if he didn’t feel so guilty. At least I think he feels guilty and that’s why he left. Or maybe he just doesn’t love me because I changed too much.
I hurt my Ness. She is forever blinded and it’s my fault.
I can’t return to her, for I know she would forgive me and I can’t even forgive myself. But Jake what if I was in pain right now from you being gone? Her voice flooded my head as it had done many times since the accident. I can’t hurt you- her more by returning. What if that was the one thing that would make me feel better? What if that’s the one thing I need to survive? What if it’s the one thing I want? She asks me and I realize that I could be keeping my Ness from having everything she wants. I think about it before deciding that maybe I should go and see what she wants. Maybe she would want me. Even after what I’ve done.
“Renesmee?” my mom calls my name, “are you ok? You seem spaced out?”
“Well my eyes don’t work so I would assume I always look space out Bella.” I say with no emotion. I don’t like talking to anyone anymore. Without him there is no reason to be anything but gloomy.
“It’s not your eyes. It’s the fact that you aren’t eating anything anymore and you don’t try to put any emotions into anything anymore and I can understand why-” I am betting she looks towards Dad, “but it’s never going to get better if you don’t try.”
“Talking from experience are we Bella?” I knew what happened. Jake told me and she didn’t do anything for the longest time after Dad left.
“Renesmee!” My dad growled as he said my name under his breath. Momma was probably too shocked to talk.
“I’m sorry Bella. That was not a reasonable thing to say.”
“It’s fine Renesmee. Sometimes the pain is too unbearable and we understand.”
“No, you don’t. You don’t understand it at all!” And with that I stood up and spun around to crash into the warmest arms I ever felt.
“Nessie.” He crooned softly in my ear.