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Before she Jumped



1. Jumping....almost

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I stepped out to the edge, keeping my eyes on the empty space in front of me. My toes felt ahead blindly, caressing the edge of the rock when they encountered it. I drew in a deep breathe and held it... waiting for the beautiful illusion.....

"Bella? Bella!"

This was not the voice I expected or craved. No, this voice was not velvet, but husky. It sounded angry-no-anxious. This voice belonged to my best friend, Jacob Black. Hadn't Billy said that he was hunting Victoria? Had he been lying?

"Bells! What the heII are you doing?!" Jacob yelled, closer now. I could hear his footsteps,crushing the weak rocks underneath his feet.

"Bella, listen to Jacob."

I grinned widely. This was the voice I was waiting for- longing for.

But, i want to jump. I didn't dare answer out loud, for the fear that this would shatter the beautiful illusion.

"I don't care! Step back right now!!" Edward yelled, his voice raising volume. I wondered why I was the only one that could hear him, then accused myself of being crazy(not out loud, of course).

You broke your promise, now it's my turn.

I crouched, ready to spring. The footsteps gained speed.

"Bella please!!" Jacob and Edward begged at the same time.


I let out a long waiting breathe, and tipped forward.

Istinctively, my eyelids crushed together. I felt an impact, but it felt wrong. Instead of smooth and...well...wet, it felt hard and warm. I assumed that i had just jumped wrong, so i kept my eyes closed. I squirmed a liittle bit, but felt no pressure.

Then, i heard a splash.

My eyes jerked open; that was the last thing i expected to hear. Wondering what just happened, i realized that Jacob wasn't here. Then-in a sudden spasm of panic- I realized what happened.

I crawled quickly towards the edge of the cliff, and was surprised how far i had been knocked back. I felt a sharp pain in my back, but i ignored it. Peeking my head over the edge was terrifying. How could i have ever thought of jumping so far down? I thought of Edward's horrid words: Well, i wasn't going to live without you......

Selfish,greedy, shallow, mean, horrible person. These words shot through my brain while thinking of the pain i would cause people if i died. But, the one person i could live with if all else failed, was gone. He didn't want me... would he care if i died now?

Finally focusing on the matter at hand, i searched for a figure in the water. My eyes were frantically looking for a sign of life. Where was he? I felt tears swell up in my eyes, thinking of the worst possibilities. Could i live without Jake? Not that i knew of. Now that.....he.....was gone-i wouldn't let myself think the name- Jacob was the most important person in my life. He was the one that made the nightmares go away, the one who protected me, the one that made everything okay. He had to be alright.