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Renesmee's Eternal Dawn

Summary:
Renesmee's Eternal Dawn is Renesmee's POV of Breaking Dawn starting from the womb until the end of Breaking Dawn.


Notes:


1. Hope

Rating 0/5   Word Count 3235   Review this Chapter

Let's start from the very beginning…

Chapter 1

Thirsty… So thirsty…

"What's going on?" Her words were quiet, barely a above a whisper. Her voice, though low, was gentle and kind like she didn't even mind her loss of blood, of warmth.

I remember being so weak and crazed by the thirst that I couldn't think, I just acted. I took blood from her every so often feeding the hunger in my body, my throat. What pained me was that every time I took from her, she grew weaker and closer to death. And the closer to death she became, the less likely anyone could save her from my harmful effect.

"Jacob had an idea that might help you. It won't be," he paused. He seemed to not know how to order his words. But then he continued, "Pleasant. But-"

"But it will help the baby." The familiar voice was kind but rushed. She seemed anxious and I couldn't blame her for wanting to help my mother get better. "We've thought of a better way to feed him. Maybe."

My mother's body jerked around while a horrible retching noise came from the back of her throat. I wanted to make her better, make her not hurt. But what really frustrated me was that I didn't know how. I didn't have the strength to stop feeding from my mother and I knew that that is why she was sick, why she was slowly dying of loss of blood. We didn't have very long left; we were dying by the minute. Mother of starvation and loss of blood, myself of lack of blood.

"Not pleasant?" She asked after her body calmed itself. "Gosh, that's a change." Her voice was sad, sarcastic, and weak.

I wanted so badly to stretch my arms and legs, they were getting so cramped it caused me physical pain. But I knew I couldn't hurt her, not anymore. I was already killing her so I didn't want to cause her anymore pain before we fade into nothing-ness.

"Bella, love," my father said just as quietly as she. "We're going to ask you to do something monstrous, repulsive." His voice sounded discussed, more so than I could of imagined.

A deep swirling of breath surrounded my body like a caress and I knew my mother had to work hard for a breath this large. "How bad?" my mother asked like she was scared of the outcome.

"Well, we think the fetus might have an appetite closer to ours than yours. We think it's thirsty."

"Oh," she paused. Then fully realizing she said, "Oh."

"Your condition-both of your conditions- are deteriorating rapidly. We don't have time to waste, to come up with palatable way to do this. The fastest way to test the theory-"

"I've got to drink it." My mother whispered to herself and to me. Her voice was aimed toward me like she tried to avoid everyone's gazes like she felt ashamed. "I can do that. Practice for the future, right?"

Someone was growing impatient as my mother talked. Whoever it was they were tapping there foot loudly on the floor nearby.

"So who is going to catch me a grizzly bear?" Her voice seemed nervous and as the silence carried on and the tapping stopped I knew she just grew more uncomfortable. "What?"

"It would be a more effective test if we don't cut corners, Bella. If the fetus is craving blood it's not craving animal blood." His voice seemed calmed but also hard, argent.

"It won't make a difference to you, Bella." Said Rosalie's voice like she was giddy with excitement. "Don't think about it."

"Who?" my mother asked in an unsure voice.

"I'm not here as a donor, Bells. 'Said its human blood that things after, and I don't think mine applies" He sounded like he hoped that he didn't have to give blood to help her. It seemed that he was uncomfortable at how my mother and I would be drinking his blood.

"We have blood on hand." Said Rosalie quickly not even bothering to be mean to Jacob. "For you- just in case. Don't worry about anything at all. It's all going to be fine. I have a good feeling about this, Bella. I think the baby will be so much better."

My mother's warm hand touches me through her stomach from which she holds me. She sits in silence for just a moment thinking this all over. Then, finally, she said, "Well, I'm starving, so I'll bet he is, too. Let's go for it. My first vampire act."

Everything was now quiet but I could hear the faint whisper of the others talking in low murmurs. They were all out of my hearing range and with my vampire wall surrounding me I couldn't really hear much of anything unless I really tried. Soon the footsteps returned.

"Not clear, Rosalie." Said my father sounding agitated that she wasn't thinking.

"This was your idea?" my mother asked not paying attention to my father. Her voice was just above a whisper but she sounded like she was trying to sound louder than it came out to be.

"Don't blame me for this one. Your vampire was picking snide comments out of my head." Jacob's voice seemed angry but also sad in a way. He wanted momma to be okay but that wouldn't happen until I was either out of my mother or we were both dead.

"I didn't expect to see you again." My mother said in a hushed tone.

"Yeah, me, either." He snorted.

"Edward told me what you had to do. I'm sorry."

"S'okay. It was probably only a matter of time till I snapped over something Sam wanted me to do."

"And Seth," momma whispered.

"He's actually happy to help." There was a slight smile in his voice.

"I hate causing you trouble."

Jacob snorted again and momma said, "I guess that's nothing new is it?"

"No, not really."

"You don't have to stay and watch this." Her voice was hard to hear even from my point of view.

"I really don't have anywhere else to go. The wolf thing is a lot less appealing since Leah joined up." Said Jacob.

"Leah?" My mother asked with a small gasp. She was afraid and unsure of that name and I, myself, didn't know why. But is my mother was scared of that name then so was I.

"You didn't tell her?" Jacob's voice was hard and accusing. He wasn't talking at momma so he must be talking to my father. Accusing him of not doing something Jacob thought he should have. But if Leah's name scared momma than I agreed with my father for not telling her because no one wanted us scared, momma would worry herself sick.

"Why?" momma asked obviously ignoring Jacob's accusing question.

"To keep an eye on Seth." He sounded annoyed but no longer accusing which soothed me because he was being gentle with her.

"But Leah hates us." Momma whispered not paying attention to Jacob's softness.

"Leah's not going to bug anyone. She's in my pack so she follows my lead." Jacob pauses then said with a smile in his voice, "You're scared of Leah, but you're best buds with the psychopath blond?"

A hiss of air came from a further distance, maybe from another part of the house and I had a feeling it was from Rosalie herself rather another member of my family.

"Don't. Rose… understands." Said my mother defensively.

"Yeah, she understands that you're gonna die and she doesn't care, s'long as she gets her mutant spawn out of the deal."

Jacob's words were hard but also had truth in his voice. Momma and I could be dyeing if this experiment doesn't work but Rosalie also dose want me to be safe which is why she is constantly wanting to keep me, 'The baby', safe. But she never says anything about keeping momma safe.

"Stop being a jerk, Jacob." Said my mother her voice going horse and sounding raw.

"You say that like it's possible." His voice was once again calm but the hardness never disappeared.

Finally the footsteps reappear getting closer to us by the step. Momma moved just slightly, taking something into her hands. I could feel that she was unsure and scared. And so did my father. "We could try another method." He said as quiet as my mother. His voice was reassuring, willing to make my mother as comfortable as possible trying to make this as easy for her as it possible could be.

"No. No I'll try this first. We don't have time…"

The thirst was again making itself known to me and all I wanted to do was take as much blood from my mother as my body would consume but I knew that it was wrong to want that, so instead I waited. But as I waited I felt as if my insides were burning like they were engulfed in flames.

Momma's entire body shifted and I had to try hard not to move or bump around knowing that if I had she would be hurt and as much as I felt for her, I couldn't risk it.

"Thanks." Was momma's reply.

"Don't mind them," Said Rosalie, her voice coming from over me. She wanted my mother to consume whatever they thought would help us but just so it would help me. She wasn't even worried about my mother's comfort.

"Bella, sweetheart, we can find an easier way." My father said trying everything to make my mother feel safe and unpressured.

"Plug your nose." Rosalie said when momma took a deep breath.

"No, it's not it. It's just that it-" she took another deep sweet smelling breath, "It smells good."

"That's a good thing. That means we're on the right track. Give it a try." She all but took her time. It sounded like she tried not to shout it at us.

Finally, momma's breath stopped for just a second and a feeling of explosion exploded within my body. It was the same effect momma's blood gave me but this I could just take as much as I wanted without hurting her. She would give it to me willingly but all too soon she took it away.

"Bella, love," Said my father.

"I'm okay." Whispered my mother. "It tastes good."

"That's good. A good sign." Aunt Rosalie seemed relieved but still hesitant.

Momma then took a big drink filling my stomach with more exploding flavor and I would feel us gaining strength and energy. Momma was getting stronger which meant that we could make it through this.

"How is your stomach? Do you feel nauseated?" asked Carlisle, my father's father. He was a doctor who made sure momma and I was okay.

"No, I don't feel sick. There's a first, huh?" Momma sounded stronger her voice was above the whisper I had grown used to. She talked almost normally.

"Excellent." Said Rosalie in what I believed in a sing-song voice.

"I think it is a bit early for that, Rose." Said Carlisle.

More blood rushed into my body but in a few seconds it stopped. "Dose this screw my total? Or do we start counting after I'm a vampire?" Asked my mother.

"No one is counting, Bella. In any case, no one died for this. Your record is still clean."My father stopped speaking and must have turned away because when he spoke again, his voice was further away. "I'll explain later."

"What?" Asked my mother.

"Just talking to myself." He was speaking to low for momma's human ears to hear.

Finally, momma gave me more than a few swallows of blood and my body was no longer aflame. I could feel the strength running through both of our bodies and I felt better about momma healing. Of course I wanted more blood it is just that the amount I had already consumed made the pain dull though it is still there, but just faintly.

After a few moments of sitting in silence I heard my father laugh. It made momma feel good and happy to hear it. And honestly it was the first time I had ever heard his laugh. Of course my mother talked to me all the time and laughed sometimes. But when she did this, no one seemed to breathe.

"Something funny?" momma asked.

"Jacob," my father said a chuckle still in his voice.

"Jake's a crack-up." Said my mother in a smug, kind voice.

"Bada bing." Jacob replied.

Soon we had consumed all the blood but I skill wanted more. My stomach was not full but I also knew the more I drank, the more momma would feel better and the more daddy would feel happy. Plus, I knew momma liked it as well.

"I did it." Said my mother dazed. Then she turned. "If I keep it down, Carlisle, will you take the needles out of me?" she sounded hopeful.

"As soon as possible." His voice was kind and I could detect hope in his voice as well as victory. "Honestly, they aren't doing that much good where they are."

"Wound you like more?" Rosalie rushed.

There was a slight movement to my mother's body but my father's voice spoke next. "You don't have to drink more right away." He soothed.

"Yeah, I know…But… I want to."

"You don't need to be embarrassed, Bella. Your body has cravings. We all understand that." Rosalie's voice soon grew harsh as her voice turned away from us. "Anyone who doesn't understand shouldn't be here."

"I'll be right back." Said Carlisle as he walked out of the room.

"Jake, you look awful." Momma said.

"Look who's talking." He replied sounding not himself. He sounded tired, annoyed.

"Seriously, when's the last time you slept?"

"Huh. I'm not actually sure." He admitted.

"Aw, Jake. Now I'm messing with your health, too. Don't be stupid. Get some rest, please. There're a few beds upstairs-you're welcome to any of them." Said my mother as she put a lot of emotion into her voice.

"Thanks, Bella, but I'd rather sleep on the ground. Away from the stench, you know."

"Right." Said my mother as our hopes dropped.

We had finally gotten the blood- and she had given it to me until it, too, was gone.

"How do you feel now?" Asked Carlisle.

"Not sick. Sort of hungry… only I'm not sure if I'm hungry or thirsty, you know?"

"Carlisle," said Rosalie. "Just look at her. This is obviously what her body wants. She should drink more."

"She's still a human, Rosalie. She needs food, too. Let's give her a little while to see how this affects her, and then maybe we can try some food again. Dose anything sound particularly good to you, Bella?"

"Eggs," momma said without hesitation. There was an easy silence until my father said said, "Jacob, you really should sleep. As Bella said, you're certainly welcome to the accommodations here, though you'd probably be more comfortable outside. Don't worry about anything-I promise I'll find you if there is a need."

"Sure, sure." It truly sounded like he was going to fall asleep on his feet.

"I do."

"Feel better." Jacob told my mother sounding vary close to us.

"Thanks, Jacob."

"Get a blanket or something." Said Jacob as his footsteps faded away. But soon they sounded like thunder.

"Jacob?" Asked my mother but he was already gone. "Edward?" Momma was worried and my father was there to comfort us before momma could go on a panic attack.

"Shh, Bella. It's okay." In a much lower voice her muttered Carlisle's name.

"Edward, what is it?" Carlisle's voice was urgent but also calm.

"There are other members of the wolf pack entering our land. They want to talk to Jacob and the others." Daddy was holding my mother for comfort but she was holding her stomach in panic. "There are four of them but only one is in human form. It's Jared and he brought along Paul, Quil, and Collin. I wonder why he sent a child and not Embry."

The room was silent no breathing except for mommas and no heart beat aside from momma's and my own.

"They are here because Sam sent them to beg them all to go back. Especially, Leah. She's not too happy. They are trying to use Seth and Leah's mother to drag them back but they are not giving in."

"Here are some clothes for Jacob. I figure he needs them now that he has no others." Said Esme, my father's mother. She was as gentle and kind as my mother and vary loving. She exited the house going to place the clothes somewhere he would find them.

"Bella, how do you feel?" asked Carlisle.

"Still hungry or thirsty but I still can't figure which one it is."

"Do you want to try some food now?" My father asked gently.

"Okay." She sounded unsure but willing to try.

Most of the family cleared out of the room, Esme to cook the eggs, Rosalie to help her. Carlisle disappeared but I didn't know where he went. It was only my father, momma and I left in the room.

"Are you sure you are ready for this? I don't want you to get sick just when you are starting to get better." Said my father his voice seemed hesitant.

"Edward, I have to try. Even if it is just once." Momma said as she relaxed upward leaning on the back of the sofa.

"Okay."

"Is Jacob really okay, Edward? I can't help but to worry about him." Said my mother in a low voice.

"I know, Bella. He is going through a hard time with separating from the pack and having to keep track of two members of his own pack and worrying about you and the perimeter." Said my father sounding so close to me.

"When you put it that way it makes me worry more for him. He's not getting enough sleep. And I don't want him worrying about me when he has so much other stuff on his plate."

"Bella, you don't know how natural it is for everyone to worry about you. It's just…. So expected. You are a magnet for life threatening events. You have to have multiple unnatural characters worrying for you."

Momma let out a short breath through her nose in a soft snort.

We could easily hear the footsteps returning down the hall, Esme's footsteps. But as she continued to creep forward, a repulsive smell followed her. Momma was nervous and my father was scared.

I finally could hear the others returning from the hunting spree they had attended today. But they didn't come through the main room; they went straight up through the window to the second floor to the house.

"Here we are, Honey." Said Esme.

My mother sat up more and took something into her hands. My father sat beside us with his hands on momma's waist. "It's okay, baby." He murmured. "You don't have to eat them."

Momma took a small bite and swallowed. And my stomach reacted strangely it hurt and the taste of the eggs was revolting. Momma pushed the plate away and someone took it from her. We were moved a lot then finally laid back down on the sofa warm and comfortable.