Edward and Bella are born and raised together, There life is sheltered and untouched by horror until tragedy strikes killing Bella's father in a horrible accident and everything they had is taken from them and Edward is driven insane trying to get back to her. and what they once had. All Human Twilight FanFic
(This story deals with Abuse , Drug use & Suicide, Please be prepared for this.)
5. The Price
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I noticed them years before they noticed me,
No one really noticed me. I liked it that way , The less people who noticed me the less people that would realise that I had been held back to many times for it to be considered anything but sad,
I was lucky I was really short for my age.
They just blended in at first. but it was hard not to notice that they were attached at the hip ,At an age when girls were meant to be considered the enemy.
The first time I ever really thought they were special was when they were maybe eight and I saw Bell sitting on a park bench crying , the crowd was to thick at first to see if she was OK , people moved everywhere making there way to class but as I got closer I saw him in front of her on his knees. He kneled in dirt holding the sleeve of his jumper firmly to her , he slowly pulled away his now bloody sleeve and lightly blew on her grazed knee.
She wiped her tears and looked down at him smiling through her pain as he soothed her wound. He dropped his bag of his back and started to undo the front pocket and looked through it quickly, When his relaxed face spread with the hint of a grin as he pulled out the white piece of plastic that he tore open to reveal a band aid.
He continued to blow on the cut for a few more minutes but then he gently glided the band aid on and with it taking all the hrt from her eyes, he stood up and leaned forward wiping the few remaining tears that were scattered on her cheeks and whispering something sweet in her ear that made her laugh as if the wound had never existed.
He had that power on her , every day I saw it , he had the power to make her world bright and with that it made his bright, that's something worth fighting for, no matter how young and naive they may of seemed to everyone else.
It was an interesting situation to say the least.
Being in the middle of this doomed relationship at such a young age.
Quietly sitting back and watching these two poor kids hang on to something that wasn't grounded and would eventually bring them both undone.
To my family and the others that were connected to Billy Black, Bell was just this kid who was suddenly at the family BBQ's and events with the Black family , the adults gave her sympathetic looks for loosing her father and praised Billy and Sam for giving this unfortunate child a home and a family.
But that was the thing ,
I had gone to school in forks my whole life and had watched these two crazy little kids that were in complete love and they were happy. I had watched Edward beat the shit out of anyone who caused her harm and it was kinda sweet to watch until the car accident, Because up until then I assumed she already had a family that spaded out further then just Charlie , but for some reason that just didn't seem to matter when Charlie died.
Edward Bell and myself were left wondering why , how could adults be so cruel as to take away the only solace they had left on this earth. Law's meant nothing to children so young and hurt.
No one ever seemed to really wonder why he carried her from the wreck so fast and so far , I wonder that day and night because the more I got to know Edward over the years , the more I realised that , what happened that night defined him.
My father hunted with Jacobs family and I had spent allot of time with the Black's ,
Enough to know this would end badly ,
I wasn't the smartest kid I the world , I believe my skills lie in other areas and one of them is being able to read people and my entire life I have never liked Billy Black.
There was something so obviously wrong with him wanting her to be with them and away from the Cullens,
Not to many knew the truth.
That he ripped her from the arms of the only women she has ever known as a mother forever leaving a hole in her heart.
They were my distraction in the begining , from my life , from my parents that hated each other and spending my life waiting for there relationship to come to its inevitable crash ending.
Which is why ease dropping on there conversations about the Black Family were no real help, He never told her his secrets and neither did she.
It started to become almost like an obsession for me watching this whole thing unfold, it was a psychologists dream and yet the gaps drove me mad.
Until I head my father on the phone to billy and I heard him use one word that made everything make seance 'life insurance'..it was so stupid , I couldn't believe I didn't see it before , he was after the big pay out.
It was the kind of thing that could make your blood boil , like it showed him for the man he was and there was no taking that back.
To steal some ones light like that.
She was so tiny and horrified the fist time I ever really got a chance to talk to her. It was on a family hunting trip , which meant all the kids and mothers would hang out at the cabin while the fathers hunted.
She hadn't spoken a word and it seemed like no one noticed this girl drowning in front of us, she made her way up stairs to the play room alone while everyone else sat and watched a movie and the mothers drank wine in the far kitchen.
I followed a minute after not sure exactly what it was I should say to her , I just wanted to know if there was any chance that I was reading her wrong and maybe she was excepting this situation but as I entered the room I found her sitting alone on the floor in the middle of the room starring into space.
Her head snapped into my direction but her face remained frozen in its broken state showing her eyes that looked constantly sore from crying.
I walked over and sat next to her staring down at the book that she always had gripped to her chest anxiously.
"Do you ever see him?" she asked weakly,
"not allot , he doesn't go to school allot."
She nodded and looked down again , "but when you see him, does he look OK...don't lie"
I looked at this poor kid and I know most people would say don't add to her worries but I looked at her and saw some one capable , collected and deserving of the truth.
"He looks like shit , worse then you if that's possible , Its not really hard to tell he just doesn't...."
"Sleep." she added again nodding to herself ,
She explained that there was no way to get to him now , Billy had cut her off every time she tried. She told me how she had run of tohis house to climb into bed with him evry chance she got , and that she just wanted to have that feeling of love that comes with being with him , that she may as well of lost a limb.
She never knew what it was like to loose anyone and now she had lost everyone ,
how do you handle that ,
Her questions were one's I had no answers to , So instead I wrapped my arms around her and told her one day it would be OK , She cried for what felt like hours and only because she had no one else to cry to , anyone who would just open up like that , especially someone who is known for being closed off like must feel really alone.
From that point on I was the middle man of their relationship ,
I was convinced if I could just help them survive on a few visits and letters here and there then I could help avoid the catastrophe that was so obviously coming ,
and not from the girl who I spent the most time with and listened to for hours talking about the the fact that she will never feel whole with out her eddy and that she would kill to have her father back for just one moment , the girl who I believed lived with the devil ,
No I never really worried about Bell , she was a survivor and though she didn't realise it , she was a leader.
She had passion for life and it came through with everything she said
because what she said,
she said with conviction.
The one I worried for was Edward ,
I liked Edward but it became obvious to me after a short time of knowing him that he was in the middle of a complete mental breakdown and keeping it silently to himself.
He terrified me from the get go because I couldn't understand why these people couldn't look long enough to see.
Edwards and mine's relationship grew fast like with bell , because they saw me as a connection to other and in that they saw each other in me ,
makes a guy easy to love.
But when Edward went missing in the woods there was only one thought that came into my mind when they couldn't find him.
It scared the crap out of me , I couldn't imagine having to watch Bell go through that ,
I Believe it would be the end for her.
So from then on out I felt really fucking luck that he was alive and I wasn't right about him , it was just a stupid accident.
I must admit there was a part of me that wanted him to leave this place too , if for no other reason then to keep the idiot safe , but that wouldn't do. It wasn't right taking him away and it would be the ending I was waiting for.
When I moved I thought I had screwed everything up for them by not being able to help them any more but with one week of moving to the big city fate stepped in and made me the man I am today.
A very fucking wealthy man.
I don't and wont admit to allot of the dealings I have made , but I have made smart one's , I have invested in the right people and product , at the young age I started at in the drug industry I found it was easier to have allot of people who owe you favours, I had finally found the place where I was the smart guy, I was a winner and took everyone I could with me.
People like my best friend Marcus were only to happy to help me with Eddy and Bell, and all for there own reasons.
I was actually in a better situation to help then I ever had been , because I had the thing that made the world go around ,
So I desperately tried to stay in touch with her but it was close to impossible and I usually had to settle for stalking her , it was impossible to ever get close but one day I sat in the woods behind her house in one of Edwards old spots and wondered how he could sit here all day and night,
When suddenly I heard her screams.
I don't know what the fight was over I just saw her running with a huge wolf next to her as she screamed at it telling it to run,
eventually her body gave out on her and it was obvious she was hurt , the sound of the shot gun going of behind her shocked me as I saw Billy pointing the gun into the woods at the dog while Bell screamed ,
he walked over to Bell and picked her up like a rag doll while she screamed and cried ,
I called the police but it didn't seem to do any good ,
I hadn't sighted Bell in days and didn't know what to do , so I did the only thing I knew how to do ,
I called Eddy and looking back now I can see that it was a desperate attempt to check on her safety but forgetting his at the same time.
I'll never really understand it ,
no one will.
Marcus said that when he last saw Edward he didn't look good , he had hung around to make sure everything went OK when he took Edward to the Forrest , but the police where there before morning and he said he couldn't stop looking at the complete helplessness that covered his face.
Edward called the police over and over and an investigation was held and like usual nothing was found to be wrong with the Black Family.
I took the first flight I could to go and see him face to face.
When I did I realised there wasn't much time , He met me at a cafe , I found him sitting in the smoking section with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth , he was more pale then I could ever imagine and his eyes held this almost crazy look that only comes from not sleeping.
"Eddy , she's gonna be alright." I tried so hard to make him see what I saw , which was a girl who I honestly believed could survive anything.
"Ive known since she left , that there's just some thing not right with prick , not just the money thing , He hates her ya know" his arm waved and his voice became louder but it only revealed more pain.
"How am I meant to sit knowing , that she's...." he didn't finish instead he just inhaled deeply on his cigarette and put it out on the table , "You need to get your shit together Eddy , fix your head before you loose it." he ignored me and pressed his head to the table and ran his hands over his head harshly.
"What ever it is your not telling everyone about that night ,
its eating you man.
you know that right.
Your not OK Ed , You gotta talk to some one , anyone...a stranger if you have to but you got to let it go Edward. or it will consume you, Until you do you cant help her....not like this" I looked into his eyes and could see it already had. there was no peace for thirteen year old boy , not anymore.
I took him home and waited until he walked up the stairs to grab Carlisle's hand. "You need to watch him more now then ever ," he became instantly angered and gripped my shoulders
"Did he say something to you ," I shook my head , I just knew. "This is it, he's snapped"
It felt likeBell's love had been trying desperately to keep Edward from slipping through it grasps. When he went missing in the woods , I expected them to find his body then but they didn't,
But when he really did do it.
He was found on a Sunday morning by his brother Emmett in the bathroom after hearing his screams , It took hundreds of stitches to repair the damage he had caused in just a few minutes ,
He had given up and in his suicide letter spoke of nothing but love for her and guilt he can not live with ,
To understand his frustration you have to first have everything but then not only have it taken away but tortured in front of you ,
he was tormented even in his dreams ,
there was no escape ,
long after everyone moved on he was still lingering in the past because demons refused to let him move with remembering ,
the helplessness of being able to do nothing for her.
these are things I could never understand because I never had anything worth loosing ,
I'm not like Edward.
I never once had everything and in many ways I thank god for that because I can see the price.
"Whats the food like?"
he's been in here for months and I was the only one he would let see him ,
though I don't know why
He never spoke ,
Well , I guess I do know why , because when he looked at me he still saw that connection to her , and he could never turn anything that had to do with her away.
"Coffee tastes like shit , I added slurping down the brown goo again. Waiting for the inevitable question to arise ,
"So I saw your brother Emmett the other day." He shook his head at me and my attempts at conversation ,
"Stop this shit , Have you seen her." he asked looking barely alive and his arms covered in bandages. I looked him in the eyes and before the words 'no' could escape them he was out of his seat and throwing it at the barred windows and storming off in the direction of his room.
He didn't care about anything but her , he didn't care about trying to hide his anger or disgust with the world anymore and that landed him in here locked up. He didnt care who thought he was crazy.
I would come every week and it always went like this because I never saw her , it was like she disappeared and it scared the shit out of me ,
I left her notes every chance I got but she wasn't reading them , I tried to get close to her but I didn't know where to look and then after months of waiting I saw her with Billy and Jacob in town,
I followed them into the supermarket and she saw me , but she made no attempt to come and talk to me , she looked at me like she didn't know me ,
like she was a zombie.
She was dead , something had happened to her , when she looked at me , she looked right through me and for once when I went to see him I had news that she was at least alive ,
I sat in the lunchroom of the hospital waiting for Edward to come out and when he did my breathe was taken away ,
he looked like her , dead and I knew him well enough to know what would hurt him beyond fixing , "Well , what do you want ," he asked rather coldly ,
"I saw her" his eyes lit up for the first time in months,
"What , Did you talk to her?" I shook my head and grabbed his waving hand ,
"I cant get close to her , its impossible and I don't think its the best thing to do , but she's OK"
his eyes filled with tears and his face dropped into the table and his breathing became almost out of control ,"Thank god , and she looked good , she's OK." I nodded
" She looked OK , really. she was laughing." the relief on his face was worth the lie , it might not of of been right , but he could do nothing for anyone but himself in here and if he was going to get better he needed to know she was ok and living her life ,
I couldn't help Bell right now but I could help Edward , but after a few months it became obvious something else was wrong , she had no contact with him at all.
He once asked me , "You knew when you met me that i'd do this, didnt you." I didn't answer I just looked at his horribly scared arms and down then down at the ground.
What I thought when I met him was that he would kill him self but I didn't think I would get so involved, that I would care so much ,
he was my friend and I loved him, so I would continue to come and sit inn this ward with some one who doesn't really want me here and that's why ,it why I done anything for either of them ,
what this is all about.
There were long weeks when he didn't speak to me at all.
When we would just sit in silence and stare at each other.
He wanted me to fuck off. that much was obvious. But I wouldn't let him win, I was waiting with him for something to click back over in his head.
I couldn't really believe that I was sitting here with him.
That he was alive , I felt lucky.
Thats why I wouldnt give up. There had to be a way to get him back.
"Do you think she's going to hate me , when she finds out what I did" I looked across at him surprised that he had finally spoken to me after being here with him for over an hour and smiled confidently
"I think she'll forgive you anything ,because she loves you. She knows you."
I wanted him to know that I meant what I said that, I wanted so desperately to help my friend but I couldn't give Bell to him so I was useless,
that's when I started to think about her window and how I could just as easy sneak up to it and talk to her but when I explained the plan to Edward he just shook his head ,
"NO , just because of that second when she'll think its me , I cant do that to her , I cant have her waiting for me when I might never get out of here , Just leave her be now. I don't want her to know anything about this ok , ever. Especially if I'm not there to explain so she wont think I..., Just keep an eye on her but from a far and just to make sure she's alive and ok, that's it"
for weeks after that conversation I waited for calls that he had tried to kill himself again but they never came and for a year I watched him sink further in to the deepest of darkest graves and stay there alone dying in his own terrors.
Emette called often telling me that he had been involved in another fight , It seemed endless. He had assulted everyone in that facility from Doctors to patients. But it almost relieved me. He was still alive. He still had fight in him. He was going to need it.
He rarely spoke to me , as if he thought there was no point , but he still let me see him so I kept going.
Marcus worried about the sweet kid that he used to know who tried to end his life , it confronted people. Make them realise you never know what some ones capable of , how far they would go for some kind of peace.
It took two years of watching him in that place , seeing the absence of what made him who he was in his eyes and all my attempts to talk to her even though he didn't want me too went unnoticed.
Edward never told anyone his secrets he just learned to live with them.
I don't know what doctor got though to him if any , all I know is after an eternity in that place something happened to him and one day after not seeing him for months I walked into the lunchroom to find him sitting with his arms folded and drive in his eyes.
I sat across from him and for the first time in what felt like forever I actually felt like I was sitting with my old friend , the kid who wanted nothing more then just a taste of what he used to have.
"You look" I couldn't find words , I was lost. He smiled and nodded,
"Every things become clearer , Ive got things to do now." he said with almost a smirk that excited me to realise the kid who used to come up with these reckless schemes was back,
"Like what." he smiled and leaned back in his chair,
'I'm coming home , and I'm getting her back , She;s my girl, and all this other shit ends now.".
"Tell me what you need me to do."
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- 13 Nov 12
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