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Buckets of tears

Summary:
Loads of one-shots, some happy, but loads of them sad! Set in many time periods, many POV's R+R!


Notes:
there is no adult content, i promise!


3. heart to heart

Rating 4/5   Word Count 703   Review this Chapter

another sad one today - alice and Bella have a heart to heart conversation about the time Edward left. Set just before the wedding, Bella's POV. Disclaimer: please do not mistake me for Stephanie Meyer, i am just her minion who keeps her stories alive (or dead, in the case of chapter 1) R+R :) :) :)

"Rose, Please stop!" I yelled as she jabbed at my eye with a mascara brush. I think she forgot that i was human, which is a problem im only too happy to change. She rolls her eyes and stomps off, muttering something about "Of course Edward had to fall in love with a stupid, unco-operative human." I just smiled knowingly. It was at that point that Alice came bouncing in, pulling me over to the huge bed in her room. She sat down next to me and gave me a look, like she was apologising for what she was about to do. She then took a large (unnecessary) breath, and said "now you are gonna be my official sister, i want to know something. I've been wondering about it for ages and i NEED to know." she paused, as if asking for my permission to continue. I nodded my head and she continued. "Tell me about how you felt when we left. and ive just seen your desision to lie to me so dont even try it! The truth, and all of it." Oh god. This was the ONE thing that i didnt want to share with Alice. I took a deep breath and went into my long description.

"At first, when he was telling me he was leaving, I just went numb. I didnt really feel or accept any of it. I thought he was joking. Then he said, I dont want you to come, and it hit me. I was losing him. The first week after you left, I didnt get up. I stayed in bed, and didnt even feel like breathing. What was the point? After that, for the first four months, i just lived. Well, physically i guess. I got up, did everything usual, but didnt hear anybody talking. I didnt say a word. It was like i was dead. Charlie tried to talk me into going to live in Florida, but i couldnt. Because then what he said would be true, it would be like he never existed.When...when i started knowing Jacob, things got better. it wasnt that i was in love with him,he just kind of filled a hole that Edward had left. then when we had that fight, I was alone again. And the hole got bigger, because two people had left my life". I broke off then, as i was crying so hard. Alice handed me a tissue, her eyes sympathetic all the while. "I didnt jump off the cliff to kill myself, but i think that sub-conciously, i didnt care if i died. It wasnt intentional, but Edward had gone, You, Esme all of the others had gone, Jacob had gone and so had the life i had chosen for myself. So, yeah, i might have been trying to kill myself, i guess. But i was so empty, and i knew that, although it made no sense for Edward to have ever have loved me, death was better than the life i had to live with. " I sighed, "i guess thats it". Alice stared at me with guilt, sympathy, horror and worry. Before i knew what she was doing, her arms were around me and she was whispering "im so sorry, i had no idea. Oh god bella! why In the name of werewolves did i ever leave??!! Are you sure you want to marry Edward? we hurt you so bad, dont do it if you dont want to." WHATT!? How did she think i didnt want to spend my entire existence with the man that WAS my life? "Yes, Alice, i felt like that because he wasnt there.He came back, and honestly, if he leaves again, I will go to Volterra and ask them to kill him for me!" She laughed, andhanded me the dress. I took a breath, and nodded. I was ready.